Well, I’m back from training camp and all I can say is, “Wow!”
That was the most challenging, yet transformational 10 days of my life. I was stretched in more ways than I could’ve imagined and I was continuously pushed out of my comfort zone. I’m so thankful for that even though I wasn’t so excited about it at the time.
The first few days were really tough. I was excited to be there and to finally meet my squad face to face, but I had no idea what I was in for. Our days were very structured although, half the time we didn’t know what was coming next. Upon arrival, we checked in, grabbed supper, and headed to our campsite. We had the chance to eat, unload our packs, and get to know our squad a little better. The evening ended with worship and a lesson from one of the Adventures In Missions staff members. This was when things got tough for me. I had never been in an environment with so many people my age worshipping and praising the Lord with all their hearts. It was amazing, but became incredibly overwhelming. I was under heavy attack from the enemy. He was telling me that I didn’t belong there, I wasn’t capable of going on the Race, and he pressed fear and doubt into my thoughts. He wanted me to feel like I was alone and no one would understand. People would just judge me. My chest became heavy and it was nearly impossible to shake. This happened the first two nights during worship and periodically throughout the day. I couldn’t keep this to myself any longer. I didn’t want to feel alone in this. I made the decision to be vulnerable and talk to members of the leadership team about what I was experiencing. I was quickly assured that I wasn’t alone and although what I was feeling felt real, it wouldn’t last. Many of the leaders prayed over me and I became at peace with where I was. I reminded myself that being under attack meant I was a threat to the enemy. I knew I was exactly where I needed to be.
Another day passed and I could still feel the weight on my chest. During another worship session, one of my squad’s coaches came by and prayed over me and another squad mate next to me. She prayed for God to pour out His joy and that it would fill our hearts and the room. And He did indeed. At that moment, I felt more joy than I had ever felt in my life. I can’t find the words to describe it. It overwhelmed me. It shut out every other thought or feeling and I couldn’t help but laugh. The weight that was on my chest was immediately lifted. It was like taking a deep breath in after coming up from under water. That moment will stick with me for a very long time. It completely freed me up to pursue the Lord without ceasing for the rest of camp.
I was able to concentrate my efforts on what was before me and I was able to be present in every moment. I now feel refreshed and my faith has certainly grown. I am now more excited to go on the Race than ever before. I got a tiny glimpse of what is to come in the next year for me and my squad and it is beautiful.
I wish I was able to transfer my memories and experiences of training camp to all of you because there was so much more that happened than just this story. It would have to be put into a novel to get through it all.
Thanks to everyone who has prayed for me or donated. You’ve helped get me this far and I appreciate each and every one of you. Next, let’s get to launch!
I’m no longer a slave to fear!
