Walking into our second day of prison ministry at a local juvenile detention center for women, my team and I are widely excited. The young ladies file into the meeting room, each wearing a bland blue uniform, and seat themselves on the floor. Their faces stand out to me. Walls are clearly built up between each of their hearts, and the world around them; a defense mechanism has been instilled.
We run through our schedule of activities: singing songs, playing games, and performing a skit. Then my trembling, very nervous teammate, Hannah, takes the stage to share her testimony with the help of our translator. I expect Hannah to tell her story. I am surprised when the Holy Spirit takes the stage instead, and speaks words that only he can. Tears are streaming down many faces as he says, “I look around, and I don’t see mistakes; I see broken people, and brokenness. I have searched for an answer to my broken heart in all the world has to offer, and I’ve found that the only one who can mend a broken heart is The One who made it.”
When Hannah asks if there is anyone who wants to be prayed over, a hand suddenly rises. From across the crowd, I see the young women’s broken heart lying open, as walls have been brought down. The Holy Spirit is moving, and I ready myself for a huge salvation experience. I rush over to pray with her.
A few weeks ago, I had a sweet encounter with the Lord. I remember feeling so present in his love, and secure, as we quietly sat together. With brightly colored crayons, and a gold sharpie pen, I wrote, “I really love you, “in my journal.
Now I sit holding a beautiful young women in my arms, as she sobs. Our Father brings the memory of our past encounter to my heart, and whispers, “Thank you for loving me. I really love you too, darling.” The layers of his words unfold, and I realize that in this seemingly small exchange, I’m embracing the Father’s heart. A self-centered part of me longs to know that she’s been saved, and that I played a big part in that. Yet even now as I write this, I can hear the Father gently rebuking that desire, “Sometimes love isn’t fixing everything. Sometimes love is holding my daughter as she weeps, and letting me work in my time.” Wow, God. You’re good.
“Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us, and his love is perfected in us.” 1 John 4:11-12
