In my previous blog, I spoke mostly to the future men of The World Race. That is the point of view that my Race comes from, obviously, but I would like to speak a little bit to the future women. I collaborated with Misty Curry and she posted a more in depth blog here.
Women, your heart is good and you are worth it.
There might be times when one guy on your team might not want listen to you bare your heart, so I pray that you notice the other guys who are fully engaged in what you are saying. Don't listen to the lie that you are a burden, especially if you are wanting to share what you are going through.
Above all else, I want to tell you…
We are not your brothers, your fathers, your ex-boyfriends or anyone else in your past.
If you take anything with you on the Race, remember that the men on your squad are not men from your past. Yes, they might betray your trust and it might be hard to live with them. They might get in your comfort zone, push you to do adventures you don't want and fart during feedback.
Please, as a man I beg you, don't start your Race with the idea that one of the men on your squad is a bad man or your future husband.
Maybe you see something in him that reminds you of something in your past… This is a projection. You are projecting his face or personality into a wounded place in your heart. It really doesn't have anything to do with him, but more to do with your heart.
I want to say it again, your heart is good.
This Race, if you let it, is going to be a place of healing and restoration.
The way you live, worship and speak about the Father are going to have a huge impact on the men around you. You will change their standards for what they consider "wife material".
The way you love will shift the way they see the Father's love. You will teach them how to love and how to love well. You will teach them about love languages, and they will become your brothers. If you let them.
Some of you have wounds cutting so deep that you don't even know that they are there anymore. They have scarred up and been tucked away. Some of these men might reopen that wound in your heart and you must deal with it. Please don't wait until Month 11 to deal with your wounds.
When they reopen the wound, your heart is going to cause you to think it was them who wounded you. While, in fact, it is much deeper than the little thing they did. It was always the little things I did on the Race that caused the biggest drama and arguments.
Explosions will happen.
Drama will happen.
Arguments will happen.
But, it's how you deal with the situation that shows your true maturity. I am not saying to avoid these confrontational situation, they need to happen, press into them and question every part of them. Question your heart in the situation and question what God is trying to do through each of them.
Shame and regret are not characteristics that come from a Son or Daughter of Christ, they are emotions and lies that are keeping you from pressing into what God is trying to do in your heart.
If you aren't careful, you are going to push the men beyond what they can handle. Men have baggage too. Men have wounds. They are growing and learning how to tend your heart. Please, be careful with their hearts. You have the ability to shut a man's heart completely down. You can destroy his safe place on the team and destroy what God has been doing in his heart, all with your words and attitudes.
Men are strong, they are there on your team for a purpose. Don't abuse that and don't take it for granted. Some men don't know what it is like to be sensitive or even relate to women. You are here to soften their hearts, not harden their hearts.
When, or if, you explode have enough character to own your part and apologize. You must let the men know that you don't actually see them as the man who caused that wound. Apologize for treating him like the man who raped you, the man who abused you, the man who hurt you. Ask him to help you walk through the healing, ask him to become a part of your process.
Through all of this, chose to start them each day with full trust. Full trust means choosing to believe they want the best for you and they are for you.
The ceiling has been set by the men and women on my squad. I am excited that you will be walking on our floor. A floor that was fought for with tears, long nights and hard words. Don't take for granted the community that is going to shape you for the rest of your life.
If you let them, the Sons and Daughters that surround you will shift your entire world.
Let them.
