“‘…God opposes the proud but favors the humble.’ So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at at the right time, He will lift you up in honor.” – 1 Peter 5:7
This month, working with Savage Ministries, our squad has been doing a lot of outreach into the community. We have done hospital visits, handed out flyers for the churches in the neighborhoods and marketplaces, visited schools, and ministered to families and visitors lined up outside of the prison waiting to see their loved ones in prison.
This week we were able to send a group of girls into the women’s prison to do some dances, skits, music and speak the Word of God to the women. We were able to pray for many of them individually and the Spirit was moving powerfully. Over 30 women gave their life to the Lord!! The penitentiary official told us afterward that because of us, they were going to start opening up the prison for other groups to come in. God planted seeds in more ways than one!
Through all of the incredible ways God has been working this month in my life – through me being able to preach for the first time, baptizing two of my teammates in the Pacific Ocean, being asked (along with some of my team) to do a house visit to pray for healing for a little girl in a wheelchair, building relationships with the people here – the Enemy has tried to pry his way into my thoughts.
I have been allowing Him to speak fears…..the fear that although I know God is Sovereign and I completely believe in His power, I doubt that He will work through me in miraculous ways.
I have felt like I don’t have enough faith.
I have felt like I am not worthy enough for Him to work through me.
Lies from the enemy…and I figured a good fear to overcome!
My squad leader was telling me that sometimes the root of that kind of thinking is pride. That confused me at first, but I took it to the Lord. I don’t know if this will make sense, but I wanted to share a piece of my heart when it comes to how God has helped me overcome this fear. This is an excerpt from my journal:
“Humility is something the Lord has been working on me this month. Especially because I was having doubts that God would actually work through me in a powerful way. The reality is, it’s not about me…it never has been and it never will be. It’s about God working through me and more of His glory being shown through my weakness. It comes down to pride when I think God can’t work through me because I don’t have enough faith. Pride focuses on myself and why God cannot or should not use me due to my flaws. Humility says, ‘Lord, I am weak, and a sinner, not worthy to even be in Your presence. But I am here to bring glory to Your name. Use me and let there be no doubt whatsoever that Your power is great and limitless.’
Use me Abba. Bring people into Your kingdom through the words You put in my mouth, whether preaching, prayer, encouragement, or teaching. Work through me and may Your power be displayed through healings and miracles. Pour out Your Spirit upon others through my hands; through the work and service they do, bless and build up others. Bring joy – Your joy – to others through my smile. None of this is my doing but Your Spirit at work in me. Take away any pride in my heart that says it’s about me and my level of faith or skill that allows You to work. You work whenever you want, through whoever You want.”
“Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think anything of ourselves, but our sufficiency is of God.” – 2 Corinthians 3:5
“‘My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.’ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me…for when I am weak, then I am strong.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9 & 10
