Being on the world race you learn what it is like to live in close community. You are always surrounded by people. You share the same house, meals, friends, ministry and adventures, getting the opportunity to really know people by experiencing the strengths and weaknesses they all have. Most of the time I really enjoy my team members, but other times they present more of a challenge…but that’s life on the field.
Last month in Jordan I was tired of community. I was tired of trying to make it work – to stay connected and in unity…whatever that means. My teammates are not bad people, but I was just tired of the closeness. I have never been around the same people for this long – unless you count the years growing up in my parent’s house. But when things get tough, if you press into God, that’s when the most growth can happen. Here is some insight that God gave me as I was praying about living in community.
Jesus forgives us every single time we mess up, when we are fake, ignore him, put other things first, are hypocrites, disobey Him, hurt others, don’t listen to him. This list goes on and yet He always forgives us and loves us. He loves us and then comes alongside us, helping us to walk through and to grow stronger if we are willing.
Many times we find it hard to love others or even like them, which is okay – if you realize it and want to change. First, we must focus on being like Jesus and always loving and forgiving not trying to fix them or push them away so you don’t have to deal with them. Your relationship with God comes first. As you get filled up by Him, His traits will come out in you. For example: You’ll want to forgive others more quickly, and you’ll want to love the people around you more. As we spend time with Him, we will walk like Him more and show love to those we did not love before. Because we will see them how Jesus sees them and treat them as Jesus does.
This is not always easy because there is a cost to pay, and we must be willing to pay it. If you are not willing to stand behind your words, they will just return void and so will your intentions. There is so much growth that can happen when you love someone you think you cannot love and do not even want to be around. This is why Jesus says love your enemies and love your neighbor as yourself. The good samaritan loved the man that cultural standards said he was not supposed to love. We can do the same within community. The frustration of personality differences can cause us to avoid relationship, but Jesus enables us to love and choose connection. If you look at this world, most problems stem from relationship issues people have with each other. If we could actually put into practice the biblical principles of community, this world would become a much better place – but we need to recognize there is a cost that it takes for this type of community.
I think we all know people who have left a church because of “differences” or been “hurt by the church” but those are very vague. Some have good reasons and others might not. If many really stop and think about – the problem isn’t actually the church, it’s people in the church that have hurt them. There is always a root. When we hold onto the bitterness and do not move on to forgiveness, deceit can be sown into our hearts and now nothing the church or people do is good. Our perspective is changed. We may even bring people to our sides who feel the same way and continue making the divide bigger. Before there is a complete split or we just get up and leave the church in search of a better one. But, the church next door is also made of people. There is always a root cause that issues can be traced back to. We must take the time to talk things through in love and to give feedback, letting both sides hear what the other has to say. You have to take the time to go and talk to them personally. Don’t let people define what God should be defining in you.
We need to be looking out for each other, to be calling out each other when one is trying to sow deceit. Talk to them about it ask them if they have gone to the person, ask them if they have forgiven them. Do not justify that person’s complaints even if they are correct just because you want to please that person. If they are complaining to you about a person, that person should be in the room with you to allow his side of the story to be heard. Calling out the problems in each other can be an act of love to help us grow closer to being who God called us to be. We all want to be more Like Jesus, and community done right will help us get there on the fast track.
Compared to the World Race, our North American world is typically not intense community-life. However, the church is supposed to be a strong community, and others are supposed to know us by our love. If we want to build that church in the world we need to start with our own local church – our family and friends. Living in close community really helps see the fast spread of problems caused by unhealthy community. Unfortunately, in the church today these changes happen slower, and sometimes it seems too late to fix the problems. Choose to jump on bitterness, deceit, gossip, discord or anything else that can harm community quickly, first starting with yourself, and than with others.
