The enemy has tried to paralyze and stop me in 3 ways:
1) Fear
2) Distraction/apathy
3) Discouragement/Doubt
The biggest one lately that I have been noticing is distraction. I work a full time 9:30-5:30 job. I’m still learning how to balance a social life and get the practical things done as well. The trip being so far away, sometimes it just doesn’t seem real. I’m the person who is usually in denial and numb until something actually happens. It might not fully hit me until I am boarding the plane that the summation of so many prophecies and words spoken over me and dreams planted in my heart are actually happening. Throw in the Holidays and it’s a recipe for distraction. Not all distractions are bad either. But distraction is tricky, as it not only takes away my focus, but that leads to me doubting my calling. Am I really called to this? Do I really have what it takes? Then works and guilt start trickling in. I should really be praying more. Why don’t I have the desire to pray?? Am I crazy for doing this??!
But Jesus is so faithful. When I feel myself sinking in the waters, all I have to do is look at Him and He pulls me out. And Him pulling me out doesn’t mean I have to try to force myself out. He does all the work. I just reach up.
Or it’s like when the Israelites were traveling through the wilderness and began complaining, so God allowed poisonous snakes to come out and bite everyone. (Bitterness and complaining/grumbling are toxic and bring death to our spirit.) The people cried out to Moses and God told Moses to create a bronze snake and put it on a pole. He told everyone who was bitten and dying to simply LOOK at the bronze snake on the pole and they would be healed.
As I feel that poison of doubt, distraction, and apathy begin to infect my soul because I was bit by the serpent, I simply cast my eyes on Jesus, the one who was lifted up on the cross and became sin (the snake) so that we may be healed, and I am HEALED! Just taking a moment to reflect on why I am doing this and clarity comes. God is ever SO READY to pour out His heart into mine. All I have to do is give Him a second of my time.
Today I prayed for Him to reaffirm my calling to go on the World Race. And He ever so faithfully answered that prayer. I am moved to tears on my lunch break at work as He reminds me of His promises over my life, and I feel my heart expand and burn for these people, these souls that I will encounter on this trip.
In the midst of the chaos, distraction, and doubt, just take a second and turn your thoughts to God. His thoughts are always toward us! His thoughts toward us outnumber the grains of sand in the entire world!!! Put down your phone, turn off the TV, and turn your gaze towards Him. He wants to speak.
