Didn’t you know? I’m REALLY important…
…but not for reasons you’d probably think. I was a pretty solid softball player in high school; once, I even hit an out-of-the-park homerun that made it on TV, but that’s not why. I was an FFA State Officer and got to travel all across Kentucky building relationships, promoting agriculture and leadership, but that’s not why, either. I traveled to Australia/New Zealand on a mission for cultural relations and addressed New Zealand Parliament on behalf of the US; not even that accolade really matters. And NOW, I’m traveling the world for 11 months, visiting as many countries, “doing life” with a team of Jesus-fanatics and praying that His love and light shine through me at all times, but that still doesn’t do it! I’m proud of these and many other accomplishments, but NONE of them are why MY LIFE MATTERS!
This past Sunday, my team was charged with the task and leading the evening worship service. (AKA: We had to preach.) Yes, we are a team of six women. No, none of us are ordained ministers. Yes, only one of us speaks fluent Spanish (and it’s definitely NOT me.) No, we were not prepared with a message of hell-fire and brimstone, or even one of hope and invitation. Yes, God knew all of this when he presented us with the challenge/opportunity.
With basically NOTHING coming to mind, we proceeded to ATL (Ask The Lord) where He would lead us to speak from. After praying for direction, Monica kept getting the phrase, “Love and my children, then bring the Word.” Well, OK, God. Becky remembered a Christian children’s story she’d had translated into Spanish before leaving for the Race called, “You Are Special,” by Max Lucado. When she read it to us (in English!), we knew it was meant for the service. (I highly recommend checking it out!) Luckily, Karen had just taught us a few skits to keep in our back pocket “for such a time as this.” One of them, “Machine,” fit the forming theme perfectly. The skit revolves around a Creator (Monica) who used multiple devices (the rest of us) to create a perfect machine, some of us with grand, graceful functions, some with very mechanical jobs and some with seemingly menial duties, but ALL functions are important in the grand scheme of things. We were each designed with purpose and the whole part doesn’t work right without any one portion. Cool. Service is coming together. THEN, Laura was lead to read Psalms 139.
This chapter speaks about how God knew us before we even came into existence. He formed us in our mothers’ wombs. There is nowhere we can go that He does not go with us. (Anyone who knows my testimony knows I definitely learned that lesson earlier this year! I digress…) Psalms 139:14 says, “I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made, Marvelous are your works.”
Fast forward a few hours to Sunday night’s service. All of the above took place, but just before the service, I found myself BEGGING God to show up. PLEADING with him to give me some sort of consolation that what I am here doing is worth it. DESPERATELY needing Him to rock the world (or at least Raul’s little church in El Prado). FERVENTLY asking for someone to come to Him that night.
Wait a minute? I thought I was the one doing the ministering! Somewhere in the mix of Becky’s story, the team’s skit (which was both HILARIOUS and EFFECTIVE) and Laura’s reading, something crazy began to well inside me. Hold up! I’m supposed to be here for these people, God! I’m supposed to help them. I’m supposed to bring you to them! Raul began to speak following Laura’s reading, and had I never felt The Holy Spirit fall before, I would have been clueless as to what took place next. Still trying to ignore the ministry pointed at me, I turned to Becky who sat praying beside me and I tried to pray for her, but I couldn’t. Sincerely, it was as if God created a barrier around her and kept telling me, “Nope, it’s just me and her right now.” And then he said, “By the way, we need some you and Me time, too.” From then on, as “Mighty to Save” played on repeat in the background, God and I just hung out. I prayed to Him, cried to Him, begged Him to keep coming, and thanked Him for where He’d led me. And then He decided He wasn’t quite done, so He had Becky lean over to me and reaffirm what He was already saying, “You. Are. Special.”
Seriously. Bottom line. End of story. Nothing else matters. I Am Special to God.
I am unique. He definitely made me different. I was formed to love Southern Gospel music, to appreciate reverence, to trust in doctrine, to sit silently and take everything in, to get angry, to sometimes need my space, to be co-dependent, to be awkward in big crowds, to crave speaking opportunities, etc., etc., etc. He made me. I’m His. And because of THAT, I. AM. SPECIAL.
“That’s why I’m something special, I’m the only one of my kind. He gave me a body, and a bright, healthy mind. He had a special purpose that He wanted me to find. I’m something special; I’m the only one of my kind.”
-Gaither Homecoming Kids, “I’m Something Special”
Be Blessed,
Ashlee
PS – After the service, Becky got the chance to pray over a lady who went on to accept Christ!!! GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS!!!
