The two weeks leading up to launch felt like a whirl wind – of things to do, people to hug, and many emotions. I had heard about the Onething conference in Kansas City put on by International House of Prayer (IHOP) and decided that I should go. For the four days leading up to the new year, some friends and I traveled down to KC to immerse ourselves with about 32,000 other followers of Christ. It was great to get away from home and to have four long days devoted to talking to God. However, I kept feeling more scared and uncertain about leaving for launch just a few days later.
Before we left the hotel on New Year’s Day, they asked if they could pray over me. As they started to pray, I prayed as well, asking for God to really speak through them. I wanted to hear from Him, and know that He could hear me. They prayed for things that were really starting to hit home. Then I got a picture that was clear to how I was feeling.
I saw myself in a mudslide. I was practically on my back from the incline. I felt the panic – it was not an unfamiliar feeling. The mudslide went straight off a cliff, pure abyss below.
The scene played over in my head as the group continued to pray and I continued to cry.
After a little while, a friend turned to me and told me that he saw a picture. I was on a cliff, and I was an eagle. He spoke of how I need to focus my eyes on Jesus, and once I do, I will soar on the wind. Just keeping my eyes on Jesus will keep me above the abyss below the cliff.
It was such a confirmation of where my focus was. Though I had been trying to focus on God, I was still struggling. I saw myself in my humanness and I was failing. Once my focus shifted to God, who I was changed into something that God saw me as, and with his strength all was attainable.
While I was packing my house, I ran across a prophesy that my dad had over me in 2009. At the end of the prophesy, it states:
“Little girl… Assignment to unfold and strengthen her. First the little girl inside causing her to be afraid.
Then an eagle ready to take off! The eagle is on the side of a tall mountain ready to take a leap.”
