…Not Yet…

While working at the ranch this summer, God (as He always does) added a few more “crazy God-moments” to my repertoire….Here’s one:

I’m sitting down at the rec hall holding a precious baby girl in my lap, absolutely loving every minute of it! 
I’m cooing at her, singing to her, bouncing her on my knee, just loving on her…

She’s absolutely enamored with me, studying my every move…giggling…just loving being loved. 🙂

She couldn’t be happier. And honestly, I couldn’t either….. 

Well, we’re at the kid’s pizza party, and my favorite time of the evening has arrived….dessert. 🙂 hehe So, here comes one of the girls with a huge tray of warm brownies and a tub of vanilla ice cream…(Are you salivating yet??….lol….That makes two of us :-P)

Naturally, I’m the first to help myself (Don’t judge me…the kids were all playing 🙂 haha) to a corner piece and a scoop of the cold stuff…

I’ve still got this precious child in my lap, mind you. And I’m still loving every moment….eating it up! … While at the same time enjoying my brownie above her head. 

I’m still talking to her….cooing….singing…bouncing…but no longer is she giggling…enthralled with me. To my dismay (good word….so dramatic!), I realize that her attention has shifted from me to what I was holding in my hand. The brownie.

I can sympathize with that. I mean, I love me some brownies. 🙂 So, for a brief moment I consider feeding it to her….And am quickly reprimanded.lol Apparently brownies and ice cream don’t contain adequate nutritional sustenance for a baby’s dietary needs. haha Whoops!!

So, I’m left to eating it above her head. And at this point, she begins reaching for it. Forget me. It’s all about the brownie now. lol

And every time she reaches for it, I’m forced to hold it farther and farther away, out of her reach. 

I heard myself say “Not Yet, Sweet Girl….Not Yet”

(As in….it’s a great thing….and one day you can have it and enjoy it…but now’s not the time….it’s not good for you right now…you still have some growing to do….Not yet….)

And then God dropped the bomb on me. haha 

I had been praying, and continue to pray, consistently for certain desires that I believe God has placed in my heart. 

And earlier that week I found myself questioning His timing…His Sovereignty….ultimately His Goodness and His Love. I was tired of waaaaaaaiiiiiiiitttttiiiiinnnnngggggg. ;-P I was confused as to why He would bother “giving me the desires of my heart” without the intention of fulfilling them. 

I had taken my eyes off the Creator and had placed them on His creation instead. My focus had shifted from Jesus Christ, to what He was holding in His hand.

I had ceased merely enjoying His Presence. Enjoying Him. Being enthralled, captivated and enamored by Him…Sitting in His lap….giggling. 
I had stopped Gazing up into His eyes….listening as He spoke to me….Resting in His embrace as He sang over me….Just loving being loved by Him. 

And the more I reached for what was in His hand, the farther He had to pull it away. 

“Not Yet, Sweet Girl……Not Yet.”

(As in….it’s a great thing….and one day you can have it and enjoy it….butnow’s not the time….it’s not good for you right now…you still have some growing to do…Not yet….)

…Plus an additional….and very loud and clear:

“How about right now you put your eyes back on Me??? I love this time with you. Where it’s just you and I enjoying each other’s presence. I’m still speaking….I’m still singing…I’m still rejoicing over you….I’m still pouring My Love out on you. Won’t you just embrace this time with Me? Trust Me…I know what’s best. I’m not withholding anything from you. I’ve given you everything you need right now, and the desires of your heart will be fulfilled….in My Time. I Love You.”