i think that most people came into training camp rather unsure of what we were going to be doing and what God would show us about Him and us. For me, this week has been one of understanding freedom and being released from my past which has led to new heights of joy.
some define freedom as being complete authority to make decisions and choose our own path in life. as a christian, i have to say that this thought is a falsehood. defining freedom means that we are no longer slaves to sin which as the bible reminds us entangles, entraps and enslaves. i have made so many bad decisions in my life that i think that were left unhandled which in a sense left me unable to free myself from my past. in essence, though i had been redeemed by the blood of Jesus, my past gave satan a toehold and has used the baggage i carry behind to keep me from fully understanding or enjoying the freedom that Christ has given me. Ron Walborn talked about bound and set churches that treat our faith as more of a checklist or rulebook to be followed or obeyed. We have to live according to the parameters and guidelines that they believe make us essentially christian. for me, this means that all of the junk of my past was taboo, was something not to be discussed but rather to be buried and let “time heal all wounds.” time never heals all wounds and no matter how far you suppress your hurts and mistakes if left unhandled, they will remain a part of you and carry negative consequences.
christians have a tendency to put up a false front and hide their sins. we go to church on sunday and paint on a smile while saying that life is always peachy and we am always doing fine. this is not the christian community that i want to live in as i am rarely doing fine. i want to be free to display my brokenness while others of the church community support me without judgment. i learned this week that this is what the body of Christ should look like. edification cannot take place where the community cannot be honest with one another.
finally i have been able to display my past in a manner in which it can be dealt with and i dont have to be embarrassed about how it still impacts me today. the trust that i feel with the july 08 race team is growing with every minute and God is allowing me to realize my freedom through them.
