Here I am in Bulgaria, staring out our patio window, thinking about the past six months and the abundance of life I’ve been able to live. When I left the states in January, I had no idea what this year would bring. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, I knew it was going to be adventurous and I knew I was on the brink of a completely new relationship with my Father.
As I sit and reflect I can’t help but smile when I think of all the things I’ve experienced thus far on the race – each memory brings a sense of joy, a sense of accomplishment, a sense of freedom.
So here I am, 155 days into the race and about halfway through my journey. Below is just a blog full of my ponderings. Ponderings of the last six months and the fullness of life I’ve been able to walk through.
These thoughts are just thoughts – messy, jumbled and maybe even a bit confusing. This is one of those unedited, say whatever comes to mind type blogs … just a fair warning. I also got real vulnerable and added some journal entries from each month too.
Consider this blog my tribute to the last six months of the race.
1. Costa Rica
Where I learned the difference between a “peace keeper” and a “peace maker.” Where I had my first real break down on the race and cried every time I called home. The place I started to build lasting and meaningful friendships with the strangers I called teammates.
“Day 4 and I already cried. Awesome. Lord, redefine my definition of PEACE. Peace is not walking on eggshells trying to avoid things and maintain order. Peace is a presence. Peace is much more than the absence of war and conflict; it is the wholeness that the entire human race seeks.”
2. Nicaragua
All squad month where we played volleyball, capture the flag and various card games on the regular. Nicaragua is where I fell in love with the kitchen staff at Vision Nicaragua and would talk with Antonia through the curtain of our room until the wee hours of the night. Also, the place where we had rats, tarantulas and mice as roommates.
“Strange animal noises as I lay here in bed & my hair actually smells good for once. I can’t get over all You’ve done here Lord and the crazy thing is I know You’re not finished.
PS: Rare occasion to have my hair washed and my legs shaved at the same time – I feel like I’m breaking some sort of World Race rule.”
“I love that this isn’t about me. I love that I have very little to do with Your work other than I simply obeyed. I praise you for the friendships I’ve made here in Nicaragua. I ask you to keep giving me a heart for the unseen, a heart for those who feel unimportant & unnoticed. I don’t know want you want to do in me and through me this month but know I’m willing … and even when I don’t seem willing, I’m willing.”
3. Honduras
Our first month without power and water, we spent many nights in the dark and many mornings without showers. My experience and observations during Holy Week were something I’ll never forget, and reframed a lot of my thinking towards how I celebrate Easter. First time I got sick on the race, that 103 fever was no joke.
“Are you willing to pour out what Christ has given to you? Take responsibility for the gifts you have. We don’t have to wait for a pounding in our chest to give away what we have. I’ve already been trusted, my part now is to just give it away.”
4. Chile
Favorite place on the race so far (Chile is insanely diverse and incredibly beautiful) but the toughest month for me in regards to team dynamics. First Unsung Hero month and my team and I traveled over 2,500 miles in 3 weeks. In Chile, the Lord really spoke to me about adventuring and what it looks like to take adventures with Him in everyday living. One of the most memorable debriefs I will probably ever had, see my blog ‘Rooftops, drug addicts, drunks and debrief’ for reasons why.
“I think people are afraid of giving up. We live in a society where quitters are losers and people who give up just aren’t trying hard enough. But that’s exactly the point; we’re all trying too hard. We aren’t willing to give up and quit. That’s when we can miss out on who Jesus REALLY is and the endless possibilities He has for us … if only we just gave up.”
“How beautiful was Your worship last night … Tears all around the table. I am constantly blown away by who You are and that You have picked these moments for me.”
5. Bolivia
Cold. Cold. Cold. Coldest month on the race by far! I ran out of clothes not because they were dirty, but because I wore them all simultaneously every day. Toughest month for ministry; very unstructured, constant changing of plans & did I mention it was freezing there? First month for team Huzzah! and it was a pure joy to do life and live in community with a new group of women. Developed a deep, deep love for community living and genuine compassion for my squad mates. Visited International Justice Mission (IJM) – literally a dream come true. Read the book Just Courage, great read if you’re into social justice and Jesus.
“8 years ago yesterday I graduated from high school and 4 years ago I graduated from UNK. Looking back I never thought I’d be here … Sitting in Bolivia with five people who were once strangers. I’m thankful for where I’ve been, where I’m at and where You’re taking me.”
6. Bulgaria
This place could easily become my new favorite. First of all, there’s a castle in our town. Casual. The river down the street serves as the border between Bulgaria and Romania. Our church is in an old historic castle, underground factory thing. (Literally the coolest church I’ve ever been in.) Best living accommodations thus far, we get our own apartment this month which includes speedy fast wifi. The most popular sport here is volleyball (yes, I’ve played almost everyday since being here) which means my volleyball isn’t getting kicked around like a soccer ball anymore. Praise the Lord.
Lessons I’m currently learning in Bulgaria: self-control and contentment.
“Just because I’m on this trip doesn’t mean I’m following Jesus perfectly – that was just one yes. Following you takes action. Intimacy takes action. Saying yes when it’s hard, saying yes when it doesn’t make sense, saying yes when I don’t want to. A YES to follow, to submit, and to surrender …”
On top of all of this, I’ve eaten llama, I’ve been to the highest navigable lake in the world, I’ve climbed a volcano, I’ve been to 7 new countries (adventure day to Peru – woot woot), I’ve slept in 37 different places, and I’ve made some really incredible memories.
But here’s the thing … My prayer is not that I would remember the adventure days or the crazy stories. My prayer is that I would remember what the Lord taught me, that I would remember the growth I walked through and that I would remember what it’s like to really be Jesus to people. Yes the stories are cool and the pictures will last a lifetime, but what’s more important to me is that what Jesus is doing in my life would become so engrained in my heart that I’d never forget it.
The adventure of the World Race is incredible, it really is … But to me the race has become more than just a mission trip, more than the acts of service I do every month. It’s about the direction I’m headed in my relationship with the Lord. I never want to forget that.
So there you have it – my jumbled, messy, unorganized thoughts as I reflect on the last six months of my life. Peace & love, y’all.
By the way, can we all just admire this picture for a minute. What a stud!
To all of my supporters: Thank you for being a part of this, thank you for your willingness to partner with me in this journey, thank you for believing in me as I follow the Lord’s will for my life, thank you for being there. It seriously means the world to me.
Last and final thing … I’m in Bulgaria, it’s incredible and this will most likely end up being my favorite month. My teammate/roommate/friend Aubrey wrote a really great blog about what we’re doing here this month, plus it has lots of great pictures! Click here to read it. Seriously, it’s worth your time.
Love, love, love!
-Vic
