“Unless a grain of wheat is buried in the ground and DIES, it remains alone. But if it dies it will bear much fruit and reproduces itself many times over. In the same way, anyone who loves and holds on to his life loves it, but if you hate your life and let it go, reckless in your love, you’ll have it forever, real and eternal.” (John 12:24-25)
Death is a word no one likes and honestly, most people fear the most in this world. No one wants to die. Yet, we serve a God who tells us that unless we die we can never truly experience life. Everyone wants to live life to the fullest! But no one wants to die.
I am realizing more and more that I have to die in order to really live. Dying is painful. Letting go of what you want honestly sucks. Giving up your dreams and hopes is the last thing anyone wants to do. I love my life. I want my life to turn out exactly how I imagined it to. I want to be happy. I don’t want to experience pain or suffering. I don’t want to give things up. I WANT MY OWN LIFE. Unfortunately, that isn’t an option my Savior gave me. So I have to ask myself the most difficult question I could ever ask, will I really give up my own life? Will I surrender to the sweetest love of my Jesus and give up my life for Him? Will I share in His suffering by dying in order to share in His glory by fully living?
These are really painful and tough questions. I would rather not think about them honestly. But I am sure Jesus would have preferred not to go to the cross. I’m sure taking those stripes on His back wasn’t His idea of a “blessed life”. When they shoved those thorns into His scalp, I doubt He felt happy or “highly favored”. But He went. What made Him so different than me? He was human. I am human. He experienced everything I have experienced (Hebrews 4:15). He chose to surrender to the will of His Father. He willingly laid down His life. Because He did this, I now live. But that’s the beautiful part. We are all so thankful for the blood that made us whole. However, it didn’t stop there.
There is more to this story, more than most of us what to know or much less do. He asked us to follow His lead and give up our lives. WHAT? Isn’t one death enough? Why do I have to die too? I don’t want to die. I WANT MY OWN LIFE! I want to make my own choices, do what I want when I want and then I would like to add some eternal life to my plan. Isn’t that the dream? No pain, no suffering, no sacrifice, no surrender and ALL the blessings that come with it. Unfortunately, most of us “Christians” have bought into this lie. That God wants us to be happy and live our lives to the fullest. We want to share in His glory, oh yes we do! I want to be in the front line where the blessings are pouring out. But who wants to share in His pain? In His death? *cricket cricket* Yep, no one wants to do that.
Death = the destruction or permanent end of something.
He’s trying to put a permanent end to my selfishness, my impatience, my pride and my desire to control everything. He’s asking me to put my dreams and plans on the altar, maybe to never see them again, and pick up His in return. Sounds like a scary and painful proposition. But I want life. I want everlasting LIFE. Isn’t there another way? I wish there was folks, but the only way to have LIFE that never ends is to die.
So He asks me again… “Tiffany, will you give up your life?”
In my heart I love Him so. In my heart I want Him so desperately. But am I really willing to make the choice to be faithful to Him, even unto physical death, in order to receive the crown of LIFE He is offering me?
Let’s get practical for a second. What does this death look like on a daily basis? Does it really mean I have to actually die? Maybe. He isn’t guaranteeing me that choosing Him won’t lead to martyrdom. But today maybe He’s asking me to die to my desire to be impatient with my teammates? He’s asking me to love them unconditionally and live at peace with everyone. He’s asking me to die to my need to always be right. He wants me to forgive EVERYONE of EVERYTHING no matter what even if they don’t ask or deserve it! WHAT? He’s cray cray. Doesn’t He know how impossible that is. It’s gets worse…He actually is asking me to not only forgive them, but FORGET about how they have wronged me and not keep a record. Now this is nuts. Worst of all, He first wants me to lay my life down for Him and then lay it down for these people – even the ones who have hurt me the worst. This can’t be right. WHO in their right mind would sign up for this gig? Yet, so many of us desire eternal life. We are hoping there is a loophole. There has to be a way around this whole “die to yourself and surrender” nonsense. If only. Only through death can we experience resurrection life.
Jesus suffered greatly in order to love us deeply. He endured the most painful death in order to give me LIFE. And He is asking me to do the same. To give up my life, and all the things that come with it, to step into His LIFE – a kind of life that lasts forever. He’s asking me to share in His suffering…only then will I truly know the power of His unrelenting love.
He asks me yet again, “Tiffany, will you give up your life?”
This time I looked into His eyes, seeing the blood dripping down His precious face, and I grabbed His hand, holes in each one where the nails had once been and said “Yes Lord”.
Whether it’s preferring my teammates, giving grace to those who don’t deserve it or even losing my physical life – I WILL DO IT. I’ll give it all to Jesus.
“Whoever loves His life loses it and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life”
Will I hate my life here on this world? Meaning, will I think so little of my life on this earth and so much of God that I will be willing to sacrifice it all – no matter how great or how small – for God?
He’s asking me to be faithful, even unto death, and persevere through the trials, no matter how painful they may be.
The one who conquers by faithfulness in the face of death is immune from the second death. The reward for faithful perseverance is eternal life. He’s asking us to continue in a state of grace that finally will lead to a state of glory.
Now, I am not living to have life to the fullest. Somehow now, I’m living just to die cause it’s only in the death of myself can I find the everlasting life Jesus died to give me.
