BLAH! We all know the feeling too well. Sometimes you can't explain it or put your finger on what is causing it, but you know for sure you feel it! Alarm goes off, you wake up and know it's going to be quite the day. You force yourself to roll out of bed, throw on something to wear and head out the door. You feel "under the weather". You've blown your nose so many times Rudolph has some serious competition. It's raining outside. You drop your folders trying to get into your car. You get stuck by the train. You spill your coffee trying to get a napkin out of your glove box. You realize you only put one earring in and your clothes don't match. You get behind the SLOWEST drivers on the planet. You catch every light. And by the time you get to work, you are ready to scream and punch someone in the mouth at the same time. The LAST thing you want to do is love people, be kind or have a good attitude. You're short with people, rude and snappy. You're moody. You're withdrawn. You don't want to be at work much less even make an effort to be nice. You feel like you have the "right" to be a total jerk today because you are feeling blah and had nothing short of the morning from hell. Then it happens…God speaks. He says "Hey, how you doing down there? Not too good I see." And then you start to defend yourself and say "You have NO idea. You were NO help this morning! You don't know what I….." And then you stop. You realize who you are talking to. You start to feel that uncomfortablely necessary feeling of conviction slide over your heart like butter melting over hot toast. ME! It's all been about ME! My issues, my problems, my frustrations, my clumsyness, my cold, my needs, my life, ME! I'm not speaking from experience or anything….haha, if you cannot tell. This was my morning. Never once this morning did I stop and think about anyone else. I was convinced to stay in a bad mood and not care about doing so. But GOD. How many times have I said that in my life. Where would I be if not for God. I was lost – but GOD. I was hurting – but GOD. I was afraid – but GOD. I was disobedient – but GOD. I am thankful for the Lord in my life, even when it hurts and is not fun. Hebrews 12:6 says, "For the Lord corrects and disciplines everyone whom He loves.." Welp, I must be VERY loved. LOL. He was quick to put me back into my place. To remind me life isn't always about m, in fact it is rarely the case. A life with Him, walking in love – every day, every minute, no matter what – is the kind He wants me to walk in. I was swift to repent and ask the Holy Spirit to come in and renew my mind, attitude and heart. The coolest thing about God is that He answers prayer! Instantly, when I turned my eyes to Him in repentance, I felt Him wrap His arms around me, like a loving Father and all the sudden my attitude began to change. I realized everything was ok and my life is not that bad. I could choose to turn the rest of my day around. Now, this is not "new" news to me. I have gone though this before and know these truths. But that doesn't change the fact that "blah" days are going to keep happening. And it is encouraging to know that He is there to help me turn my thoughts and attitudes around when necessary. It is also comforting to know that Jesus has been there. He knows what we go through. In Hebrews 4:15, it says, "…This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin." I love knowing that Jesus understands my weaknesses. That I am not alone in my feelings, and it's not wrong to feel "blah" or have a "blah day". However, He desires for me to learn how to steer those days, even still, towards good and a radical, love-driven day. For it is in that, He is pleased.
