Where a heart beats with dirt covered bare feet, and an explosive smile lights up any ounce of darkness in the air. Five little fingers swing my hand around his shoulders onto his chest, while the other five are looking for trouble or fun. Clothes torn and covered with dirt represent how hard you play. The comfort of our relationship began at first sight. This little boy had me without words.
His dark eyes brought me along for a month long journey of what I haven’t decided was a child or mother like perspective. Who am I kidding it is a little bit of both. The Father placed a love within my being to express to Masotja just how loved he is.
Location El Shaddai orphanage in Swaziland month 2 of 11. “No place I’d rather be, No place I’d rather be, than here in your love, here in your love” left his lips in the midst of our not so fair Go Fish card game. This moment was so beautiful on so many different levels. We are always surrounded by the Fathers love. Do we choose to see all that He is offering in each moment of our lives? This moment He was showing me the pure passionate freedom of a child singing his hearts song. In this moment I realized there was no place I’d rather be than showing the love the Father had placed in my heart for Masotja. Also, to understand what it meant to become a child again as Jesus calls us to.
Matthew 18:3 – “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Deciphering what it means to “become like little children”. To be free of pride, holding on to the fullness of our Father in heaven, as we are helpless. We cannot be dependent on mere humans.Where does your comfort come from? Who is the ultimate overseer of feeding you? Who can caress you without actual physical presence? This all comes from our Lord Almighty!
One night the kids and racers filled the chapel with praise and worship. My heart broke into joy when my love Masotja raised our hands together to praise our overseer, our portion, our comforter, our strength, and our love…the Father. An hour later Masotja fell asleep laying across the bench leaning into me. When worship ended I carried him down to the boys bunkhouse. It ached me to not take and tuck him into bed (We weren’t allowed in their house). This is a glimpse into the mother like perspective of wanting to care for this boy in an earthly way that he probably hasn’t experienced before or much.
There are many stories I could go into to explain how big the fire grew in my heart for this sweet little boy. He is very affectionate, but still all boy at heart. Ready to explore the world barefoot, without any understanding of fear to hold him back. He would burst out in song randomly singing so joyfully. I got to experience his joy, laughter, goofiness, and sadness during our month together.
The month had to come to an end. With cloud covered skies dispersing into fog, and speckles of water floating in the air. Masotja waited for me to get my back packing gear to pack up the hill for departure. I walked him over to the wall to keep the breeze from coming in on him at least from one direction. When I looked down to tell him I’d be right back there was a tear falling from his eye. I wiped it away. I called him my love, but was at a loss of words to say. I would have dropped all my things to stuff him in my bag, and take him home with me. The Lord comforts me in knowing that no one can possibly love him better than He himself. This boy has forever changed my heart. Although, I couldn’t promise a see you soon I can rest knowing he is in the hands of our Creator.
What it looks like to become a child again. You’re not afraid of a little dirt. Your whole heart is beating for that moment of life. Loving without judgment. Living in abundant joy with the simple beauties of life. Letting your bare feet hit the dirt running praising Jesus for all His ways.
