“Are you ready?” “Are you excited?” The questions I have heard on repeat for the past few weeks. The questions that have made my head spin in circles and bring knots to my stomach. As I answered these questions every day, multiple times a day. I would fake a smile and reply, “yes.” But the truth of the matter is the answer was and still is A BIG FAT NO! No, I am not excited, and no, I am not ready! If someone tells you they are ready to leave their family, friends, comfort of their bed, hot showers, American food, and the steady structure of 4 walls that they call their home for 9 months they are a liar. No person is ready to leave that kind of comfort. I am by no means ready. In my moment of honesty, I will also admit that I am not even excited. I like comfort and I am not ashamed to admit it. I like America. I like my bed. I like American food. I like seeing my family and friends whenever I please. But while I LIKE all of these things, I LOVE my Heavenly Father. My keeper, my protector, and my provider. The great Almighty who has called me to take a leap of faith and go on this amazing 9-month journey. So, no I may not be excited or ready, but I am going! I will follow my God wherever He may lead me. Because I know that He will not leave me wherever He leads me. This journey is going to be hard. It is going to be scary, and it is probably going to flat out suck at some moments. But overall I know it is going to be the most rewarding experience of my life so far!
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This is the paragraph that I wrote sitting in a hotel lobby in Atlanta balling my eyes out on the first day of launch. There was not an ounce of excitement in my body, but I had raised $13,805 and I knew it was where God wanted me so I was going. Later that night as I stood next to my parents in a room full of 300 plus people praising our amazing Father, who had led me to this journey, I was hit in the stomach by a sack of rocks. A sack of rocks that brought me to the realization of how selfish I was being! God has called me, little Taylor Huffine from Cartersville, GA, to travel His nation and spread His word and love to all of His children! How could I have not realized sooner how amazing this opportunity truly is!? Not only was I honored that God has chosen me to do such significant work to better His Kingdom, but it was made apparent to me that this trip was not only about myself. It is so much more than me. It is about the lives all around the world that through Christ I will be able to touch, the individuals who will be shown love for the first time, for the seeds that will be planted, and the seeds that will be watered. And not only does this trip have an impact on people in the countries I will be visiting, but also people back home. It is about my parents, my family, my friends, my donors, and my whole support system. This is not my trip. This is OUR trip, and I am merely the vessel. So yes, I am going to miss everything and everyone back home, but never will I allow myself to dwell on that. My excitement and honor will outweigh all of the negative thoughts that the devil will try to fill my head with! In result we, as a whole, are going to grow over the next 9 months. Grow as individuals and ultimately grow closer to Christ!
