PREFACE:
This last week has been very tough for me to sit down and put into words. So please give me grace 🙂 haha
For those of you that I have already talked to on the phone…Sorry – I’m – Not – Sorry, that our conversation went on forever…because I love talking to you!! However, I am sorry I have not able to see you in person quite yet!
For those I have texted back…I apologize for the late responses (some things never change) and the inability to call or see you yet!!! That will change!!!!
And for those I have been lucky to be around since I’ve been home….Sorry-I’m-not–Sorry, for the never ending cry fest that I seem to display every time I talk about training camp. Crying has become a new thing for me and it is quite lovely 🙂
The Question…..
How Was Training Camp?
My Short Answer…..
Buggy, outdoorsy, “I was Hungy,” waking up early, no sleep, strange sleeping predicaments, 57 people in a 30 person bus for 8 hours, plane crash simulations, hula hoop, being tied together by a string, eating with my hands, eggs, nalgene is my new best friend, baby wipe showers, magic carpet, only eating with my left hand (shout out to India), humidity, storm (multiple meanings there), challenging, tears up the ying yang, laughing so hard I grew a 2 pack of abs, COMPLETE BEAUTY IN BROKENNESS, grieving, mourning, joy, redemption, FREEDOM, peace, learning to listen, radical worship, dance parties, squad wars, Red Red Red Red, trust, letting go, praying like I have never prayed before, being still, strangers turning into family 🙂, forgiving, loving, and knowing that I AM LOVED SO FIERCELY!!!…..
I could go on and on…
Not only was this one of the most CHALLENGING weeks of my life, this week one of the best. For those of you that know me, vulnerability has not been my greatest strength. From day 1 at camp, God began working on my heart, as well as my team mates hearts, to dig deeper than “what we could do for others this next year.” Instead, He dug right into OUR HEARTS! Saying:
“I have always been here, I have never left you”
“You are fearfully and wonderfully made by me.”
“YOU ARE BEING FOUGHT FOR.”
“I AM in any place before you enter it. Search for ME, delight in ME”
“YOU are MY DAUGHTER, let me shower you with GRACE and REST in MY PEACE”
Lord! You Make Me Brave! 🙂 (I wish there was a happier face than this happy face)
Through His Words, Worship, divine intervention, fellowship, joy, people’s words, and prayers…God brought me to a place of Complete Brokenness. He reached into the inner depths of my heart, and took out pain/ suffering/ anxiety/ unforgiveness and let me grieve and mourn in it….Tears gushing out of me like i had a hose attached to the back of my eye balls and it could not be shut off. It started as tears of pain and turned into drowning in the Love of Jesus. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL. It was FOR SURE NOT what I was expecting out of training camp… but i have never felt so much FREEDOM and REDEMPTION than I have found now. Living life with no Expectations has been extremely freeing knowing there is someone far greater with a bigger plan than I could ever fathom.
My new Family, K SQUAD, includes so much joy, humor, humility, grace, compassion, passion, and willingness to fearlessly chase after the Love of our Father. I am honored and so excited to launch with them THIS SEPTEMBER!!!! They have already taught me so much and continue to pour into one another in the way that community was meant to be!! Such a testimony to what God’s Power is beginning to do in this group!!!
Please Continue to Pray for me and my team as we say our good byes and leave healthy this next month! PLEASE CALL ME, TEXT ME, FACEBOOK ME to meet up! I would love to see you if we can! 🙂
XXX
