This morning my team and I were blessed to have something we haven’t had in over three months; chocolate chip pancakes. Man….were they good. We’ve had so much rice and Asian food that something so rich was a treat but also something that we weren’t as ready for as we believed. The pancakes were very filling and rich, and although they were delicious we weren’t able to eat nearly as much as we had planned on eating, not to mention “holy stomach.”
As I was eating these delectable pancakes the Lord told me a little about myself. He told me….when I left for the race I was like those chocolate chip pancakes. I had the Lord in me, just like those pancakes had chocolate chunks in them. As I walked through life I had concentrated moments of intimacy with the Lord and then moments where I wasn’t walking in intimacy with him as closely as those evident moments. He represented this with the chips…there are chunks of pancakes that have chips in them and other pieces that have no chips, but the entire pancake still remains a chocolate chip pancake. My life, although containing the Father’s presence was not saturated with him, but contained only intense periods when I focused on him and not my flesh. This cycle was my life… walking in and out of intimacy with the great I AM, just like the process of eating a chocolate chip pancake consists of biting between pieces with chips and pieces without them. Pancakes are filling and although filling can sometimes be too heavy, contain too much sugar and give people stomachaches. I do not wish to be something that does not fully represent my precious Savior; I do not want to give people stomachaches.
As I ate this pancake the Lord showed me a different picture of who I am today. He showed me that now I walk in intimacy with him daily and as I focus on him at all times (which is something I am still working on daily) he saturates more of who I am than ever before. I no longer walk in concentrated times with the Lord but a new deep saturation that wasn’t there a year ago. It’s been amazing to learn what it means to be deeply infused with the Lord. He showed me at breakfast that I am not longer a chocolate chip pancake but chocolate milk. The Lord showed me that I am completely mixed with him; he is infused into all of me and not just concentrated bits. Chocolate milk is light and refreshing and I have grown much in the Lord’s strength and comfort. He smiles at me when he shows me how my reactions and choices, comfort and peace all stem from him. This representation is more complete in demonstrating who my sweet Jesus is.
It is delightful feeling the confidence in the Abba that I have never known in my life. I need only be still and he will fight for me. His love for me seeps into everything I know and it overwhelms me to think of how good he is all the time; good to his children; good to his warriors; good to me. I am chocolate milk…full of the Lord and infused with all of him and I couldn’t be more satisfied with that reality. All he asks me do is consciously stir myself; infusing him more thoroughly into me; he asks me to choose him.
Thank you father for this beautiful message this morning during our treat; thank you for your love and for your saturation; thank you for fighting for me and for always being so amazingly good to me.
Thanks for reading,
Tabbi
