I’ve always been stubborn. My family has always said that some form of our last name ‘Kafoglis’ in the Greek language means stubborn or hard-headed. I see it all the time in my dad’s side of the family and it showed in me when it was time to learn how to ride a bike…perhaps it was of mixture of my stubbornness or fear of failing/falling on my face, but either way I was holding onto those training wheels like they were the last slice of pizza on earth. I just couldn’t let go…
My dad set out to squash my fears and removed the training wheels. I remember hopping on my bike and not being able to take my feet off the ground. I’d pedal for .5 seconds, wobble and then put my feet back down again. The loss of my training wheels had my 8 year old self crippled with fear – what if I fall?
There came a point when my dad, out of frustration, brought out the duct tape. Duct tape you ask? Yes, duct tape. My feet were soon sealed to the pedals of my bike with the tape and all I can remember is the fear of not having control -what if I fall? My dad reassured me that he’d catch me and would be right there if I toppled over. Minutes later and what do ya know… JOY! I was crusin’. I was on top of the world with my duct taped feet in all of their glory. My dad was right there behind me to catch me once he saw I knew there was nothing to fear. Fear conquered, y’all and now riding bikes is still one of my favorite things to do.
Learning to ride a bike was a lot like my spiritual growth and relationship with God. I grew up in a Christian family and had a great foundation laid – I had those training wheels to keep me grounded. I knew that Jesus loved me and that I could lean on Him through prayer. I had heard the gospel, but I was not living it out. Just like my Dad, my Heavenly Father knew that I was fearful, but a Christian life with training wheels was not what He created me for. God graciously heard my plea for Him to change my heart and he answered it with the World Race.
Preparation for the World Race has been the best form of duct tape. Since being accepted, I have never been so committed to growing deeper in the word and in my relationship with Jesus. The fact that I’m leaving to help others know Jesus has been an extreme motivator for me to learn more. I used to think that attending church regularly was a task, something to just check off the list – My stubborn rationalizing thought was, “I believe in God, I know he loves me, I read my devotional, and I have a relationship with Him outside of Church, what’s the point?”
Thankfully, my world race mobilizer encouraged me to get more involved with church community so I dove straight into it with small groups, missions groups and other classes…the relationships I formed there have been a huge blessing and I know I have the support of those people to keep me accountable in my walk with the Lord, just like the duct tape kept my feet secure on the pedals. I have to say that I didn’t know what I was missing. We aren’t meant to run this race alone, God provides us with community where we connect with others who can encourage us in our faith, comfort us in valleys and rejoice with us on the mountaintops. I know my World Race squad will be the best duct tape around and I can’t wait to do life with them. This year has already shown me so much joy as well as challenges that I’ve overcome with the strength of the Lord and the community that He’s given me.
This past weekend I visited my Gran back in Kentucky. I adore my Gran, she is one of my favorite people in this world and it was her birthday the previous weekend so my mom and I were there to celebrate and spend some much needed time together. The other reason for our visit was that I was speaking to Gran’s church on Sunday about the World Race. The church has been raising funds for me and I was more than grateful to accept the invitation to go and tell my story. However, last week it hit me that uhhh- Public Speaking – yeah that’s not my forte. I enjoy writing because I can get all my thoughts down and all the bases are covered. Public speaking on the other hand makes me forget things that are written down right in front of me and my voice shakes so much it doesn’t even sound like my own.
Leading up to the weekend I played it off like it was no biggy, while I was inwardly freaking out. The entire way down from Chicago to Kentucky I prayed and practiced what to say. Even in the comfort of my car I would trip over my words. The day before, I confessed my nervousness to my Mom and Gran and they encouraged me to “just tell my story”. I wanted to barf. I practiced in front of them before we went to church, cue my shaky voice, I could feel their concern for my nervousness. I really didn’t want to let anyone down – the doubts would creep in –what if they don’t understand? I prayed for peace and courage remembering a verse that God recently put on my heart – Joshua 1:9.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened. Do not be dismayed. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go”
I walked into the church and I felt at ease for the first time. My Gran looked at me before I went up to speak, pointed to her shoulder and whispered, “He’s right here.” – She was right, He was everywhere in that room. I was wobbling with fear, but in true fashion, God was there to catch and carry me through. My voice still had a slight shakiness to it, but I was given the courage to tell my story. I can honestly say that I’d do it again. The encouragement and feedback I received afterward was overwhelming. That experience was a perfect reminder of God’s assurance and how much joy overcoming fears can bring! Just like riding a bike.
I know that learning to ride a bike does not even come close in comparison to our walk with God and community can be a lot stronger than duct tape, but when I thought of this story it made me think of how well He knows my heart inside and out. He knows my fears and stubbornness and everything in between, and He knew that the World Race would bring me closer to Him and help others know him in the process. The difference from last year and where I am today is the focus of my heart. I wrestle with sin instead of brushing it off and I’m working on taking a harder look at what God’s will for my life is, instead of my own will. He is tuning my heart daily and has given me passion to dig deeper into His Kingdom.
Amen to that!
SK
FUNDRAISING UPDATE:
Now here we are, roughly 100 days away from my World Race launch and things are getting so real. I get to meet my team at training camp in June (GO J SQUAD!) and then off to South Africa in August. I can’t express how grateful I am for the support I’ve received so far. I’m almost to my 2nd fundraising goal of $10,000 which is SO AWESOME! In order to continue on in the race I will need to raise the rest the rest of the funds by November of this year. Don’t forget that you can adopt-a-day for $50 (read more on my Adopt-a-day post) and I’m working on another fundraiser called Adopt-a-jar that I’ll post about soon!! I have so much faith that the funds will be provided and I can’t wait to share this adventure with all of you.
