A fellow racer on my squad, Kyle Johnson, had said this and I thought it was totally appropriate: “Dear pre-world race friends and family, it’d probably be easier to act
like you’ve never met me before and just get to know me all over again!”
ha so true. so I have been home two weeks now and I must say I thought leaving the USofA for 11 months would be hard, but reverse culture shock has definitely been more a challenge for me. It has been great to see my family, friends and supporters and for those of you I still have not been able to meet up with yet… I am coming your way soon!!!
When I left for the race there was a lot I thought I had altogether, but this through past year I have definitely realized my desperate need for Christ and how much more I am still in need
of Him daily. I realized on my last week of the race that I was in love with 60 people who had become my family. that the life I had left behind a year ago wasn’t going to be the same and the I was going home more broken than ever.
boy was I right, but the beauty in it all was and is that I am right where God wants me… it may not be where I desire to be, but I have been learning these past two weeks that I trusted God to take me around the world safely, I trusted Him to provide the funds to do so, I trusted in Him when we didn’t have money for food or when we didn’t even know where we would be laying our heads for the night, I trusted Him to heal people. I trusted in Him when my team and I were in a car accident in the middle of the bush and I trusted in Him to hear His voice to guide me. and to be honest trusting in God in those circumstances wasn’t that hard. It became natural to me. but trusting Him with what is next for me, with my life here back in Dallas when I have no idea what my purpose is yet… why is it harder? why is it any different? it’s not! but it is… ha.
I’ve seen so much brokenness here in America since being home. Here most people don’t physically struggle for food or shelter like in Haiti or Africa, but we struggle with depression, loneliness, isolation, drugs, alcohol, fear, people pleasing, control, security, idolatry… and the list could go one. I’ve realized there is hope in this though, that even though the struggles look somewhat different than overseas, they are the same. I’ve seen God move mountains overseas and I know He does it here too. God is with everyone, He is everywhere.
Learning how to trust in
Christ and being pushed and challenged in ways I never could imagine while on the race has helped me to find my own identity in Him. While this is still a daily struggle for me, I know He is the only thing constant in our lives and in that alone I
walk by faith and hope. a new me everyday. despite our circumstances. despite our contentment or not. because a constant
cannot fail us, it cannot bring insecurities. our God is good! and He never stops chasing us. He never quits on us, even when we have no idea what we are doing.
so with all this said I wanted to share this song by Jonathan David Helser (video above). It has gotten me through a rough 2 weeks and I hope it comes of encouragement to you too!! youtube him too, his songs are AWESOME.
Your love…
it never fails, it never ends.
Your love…
it never quits, it never stops chasing my soul.
You’re never giving up
You’re never giving up
You’re never giving up on me.
****
You’re never gonna leave.
You’re breaking off the shame.
You’re breaking off the fear.
You’re breaking off the disappointment of the seasons when I thought you’d left me.
and I can see Your hand reaching out over me
and I can hear Your voice.
I’M NEVER GONNA LEAVE.
this place.
at Your feet God.
I wanna stay all the days, the days of my life.
I won’t be afraid of what they may send
I’m never gonna leave.
I’m never gonna leave.
I’m never gonna leave.
Your love…
it never fails, it never ends.
Your love…
it never quits, it never stops chasing my soul.
