//Month 2, Guatemala//
Month 2 was all squad month, which means all of our teams come together for this month of ministry. We had debrief in Antigua, Guatemala the first 5 days of the month and then took a chicken bus to Quiche which was about 4 hours away. We strapped approx. 2,000 lbs of backpacks and gear on the top of the school bus and probably another 6,000 lbs of people and backpacks inside and we were off. Over the mountains and through the hills to Grandmother’s house we went. I was fairly exhausted and finally fell asleep halfway through the trip in the back row of the bus, but was woken up by people talking about some complications the bus was having. I prayed, had peace, and went back to sleep. Only to again be woken up again a second time with more commotion.
Let’s just say that there were some difficulties getting up and down the mountain and with several of my squadmates being in car/bus accidents before, fear was quickly gripping the bus. We decided that we should lighten the bus and about 10 people were more than willing to get off the bus. I looked out my window as my squadmates were visibly shaken by the fear of their past experiences and as teammates surrounded them, holding them, praying for them, and making sure they were okay. By God’s grace and experienced bus drivers, we made it up the mountain safely and the others rejoined us. As the bus finished the rest of the trip, we prayed for those who had been obviously affected the most, sang songs, and thanked God for His protection. The mood lightened as people began to laugh and carry on as before.
Usually in this kind of situation, I would have been panicking, but this time, I wasn’t. I remembered Psalm 91 and God’s promise of protection that He had been drilling into my heart the past month and I had perfect peace that everything was going to be okay. And it was. But as we continued our journey, something happened and I began to feel anxiety and a tightness in my chest as if someone was sitting on it. I had been in perfect peace the whole time, so what was going on?
I began to pray about it and I immediately knew that it wasn’t mine, but I was literally feeling someone else’s pain and anxiety and the Lord wanted me to pray for them. I knew the Lord could speak through this way, but I wondered if it was really Him. The people who had panic attacks had already been prayed for and had returned to mostly normal and by now it had probably been about 30 minutes since all the excitement. It felt so out of place to go back into a light atmosphere and say that prayer for heaviness still needed to take place. So I sat in my seat and continued to wrestle with the idea for what seemed like another 10 minutes hoping that either the “right” opportunity would arise or that the feeling would go away. But it didn’t, and I still felt the Holy Spirit nudging me.
I wasn’t 100% sure if it was God, but I decided that I wasn’t going to take a chance to miss out on hearing God’s voice and I’d rather obey it and be wrong, than to be right and ignore His voice again. I had to get out of my seat NOW. So as I awkwardly tripped over bags and legs getting out of my seat, I made my way to the girl I thought I was supposed to pray for. I said I had a somewhat awkward question, but was wondering if she had tightness in her chest. I was expecting a yes, so when she said “no” I was a little shocked. Great, maybe I was totally wrong about this. But. Maybe I wasn’t. I decided I wasn’t going to let the first bump in the road stop me, so I continued to ask people. And other teammates began asking people throughout the bus until we found her. It was a girl I never would have guessed because she wasn’t any of the ones who had freaked out and she still seemed so calm. I asked her what she was feeling and she describe exactly what I had been feeling. She wasn’t sure why she felt that way, but that was okay because Jesus did. I told her that I felt like I was supposed to pray for her and so I did. Then she realized why she felt that way and we prayed again.
I’m not sure what all happened in that moment, but I do know this, that even if the affects weren’t evident in the physical, God was doing something behind the scenes in that moment. It was a beautiful. Not just because I chose to listen to God and He used me, but because it showed me how much God cares for each one of us and pays attention to us individually. When our squad was able to minister to the apparent needs of those who had been affected by this event, He also saw the ones that weren’t as obvious. The ones that seemed hidden, that no one saw, and hadn’t been ministered to. And He loved her too much to not speak to her heart in that moment. I was merely a vessel that got yanked out of my seat. The real story and beauty here is in His tender love to care for His child no matter how it had to happen or who He had to use to accomplish that.
