I cannot even begin to fathom the depth of his pain. He relives ‘the moment’ each day. We are sitting on the curb outside of church. An eerie glow is painting the sky as the sun sets behind the hills. The image haunts his mind, heart and soul. He fights back tears, but one escapes, quickly followed by another. His only escape is found in drugs and alcohol, an addiction that provides a much welcomed reprieve from reality. That is why he was laughing and joking around an hour earlier. But the temporary numbness is fading. His life is a not his own at this stage in the game. Three years ago he lost his life to ‘the moment’.
‘The moment’ was supposed to give him family – a sense of accomplishment and belonging…an initiation into brotherhood. Because of ‘the moment’, he not only lost his life, but he took another innocent life with him. Yes, anger stirs within, but the immense pain that echos from his body resonates within my spirit at the same time. A tattooed tear drop is a constant reminder that he belongs to the gang – a symbol of his bravery – better understood as a death-mark.
That evening, Salud dug right in with sharing his testimony and it was a beautiful picture to see those two sharing a bible while reading scripture. Mario even stepped into the church and sat with us for half of the service. After a ½ hour, he retreated a few yard to lean on the pastor’s red bug and as the sun started to set, Mario quickly retired back to his curb – his comfortable place where he could remain somewhat hidden in the dark.
Yes, the Lord is putting people into Mario’s life to help him along the way – to love him and walk alongside him. Salud and Ricardo (another church member) have a heart to disciple him and pour into him. But, Mario needs to want it. Mario needs to separate himself from the powers that keep him entrapped to ‘the moment’. He needs the power of the Holy Spirit to move him to conviction and the saving grace that can only be found in Jesus.
Mario is not a two week project while we are in Palenque. Mario is a creation of God whom God has loved before he was born. And God will continue to love him after we leave. God is love and God is faithful. Please pray for Mario: that that his spirit would be in a position of repentance and that he would accept forgiveness and the redeeming love of his Father.
