Not everything on the Race is all jolly goodness. The Race is exhausting. Being stretched every single month. Choosing constantly to have a good attitude about what the host asks us to do. 11 months of ministry is so exhausting. To rest how you would chose to rest at home hardly ever happens. Running on your own strength is impossible. Irritability and tempers are things you have to fight against sometimes when seven very different personalities live with each other 24/7.
This month has been difficult for me. Our ministry is stretching. Our host is distant. It's hot. My personality is different then my teammates. My heart aches for home. Choosing a good attitude is difficult some times.
This has been the first month that i am counting down the days for the next country. And then the next country. And the next. And home.
I can’t do it on my own. But i wasn’t called to do it on my own.
Not only am i surrounded by my teammates who are ready to support me at any moment. But more importantly i have the strength of the Father to grasp on to.
I need to learn to rely on His strength to get me through and not my own.
To bring me rest when i can’t get it in any other way.
If it were up to me, i would be miserable the rest of the Race, slowly counting down the days. But if i rely on His strength I can count each day as a joyous occasion.
So sometimes its hard. Especially after such a great month last month in Cambodia. But God is always there to reach down and give me support. To teach me new things and grow me in new areas. As long as i stay open to Him and lean on Him, He will get me through.
He still has so much to teach me and bring me into, i just have to have patience and rely on His strength and not my own. Choosing each day to set aside time to be with Him and allow Him to pour into me as i gain strength from Him. A lesson i will be learning for the rest of my life.
Don’t get me wrong, this month has been good. God has already given me so much and taught me so many things. But the difficulty of everyday living is something i need to learn to give to Him. And something i need to learn to be thankful for.
Lord give me strength to complete the journey you have sent me on. Give me rest so that i may glorify you to the fullest. Give me energy so that i may do the tasks that are given to me with joy and thanksgiving. Thank you Lord for blessing me with this amazing opportunity to serve you in so many different nations of the world. You are so good to me. Amen.
(This song has been a constant on my Ipod latley. Its so encouraging to me.)
