I’m sitting in our little coffee table area with my team talking about finances and the way that God wants us to trust Him, and how He desires to bless us. As I listen to the conversation going on around me I find myself agreeing wholeheartedly with some points and somewhat disagreeing with others even though they contain truth, too. I sat quietly and wondered why that was and then the f-word popped out of someone’s mouth… fear. Except it practically sounded like a scream in my ears. FEAR!!! But why?
I continued to listen to the women, but I listened more to the thoughts in my head and I remembered that one of the things God told me He wanted to begin working out of me during the coming months is fear.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of change.
Fear of not being good enough.
Fear of feeling unloved.
Fear of being known.
Fear of not being known.
Fear of leaving the Race early due to lack of funds.
Fear of not getting out of this journey all that He has for me.
Fear of not being a difference maker.
Fear of having heard His voice incorrectly.
Fear of what life may or may not look like when I return to the States.
Fear of not fully being the woman He created me to be.
Fear, fear, fear…
If I sat here long enough I’m sure He would continue to reveal to me the areas in which I’ve been walking in fear rather than faith, but that would be quite overwhelming as this list of fears I didn’t know I was carrying literally came up as fast as my fingers grazed the keyboard. To what depths are these fears, these lies, woven into my being? How in the world am I supposed to walk out of them? Yes, I know, place them at the feet of Jesus. However, there are tangible things that I can do to help facilitate this process as well. After all, James wrote, “In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” (2:17) And Paul said that “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.” (2 Tim. 1:7) These are the truths that I choose to hold onto in this moment and in the days to come. As I allow God to teach me all the more what it means to walk in faith, I humbly and sincerely ask that you come alongside me in prayer about these things. And if you’re dealing with these, please let me know so that I can lift you up to Abba as I give myself over to Him.
Finally, I remind both of us of these facts:
I AM A MIGHTY CHILD OF GOD.
I AM STANDING ON TOP WITH ALL THINGS UNDER MY FEET.
I AM THE HEAD AND NOT THE TAIL.
I AM ABOVE AND NOT BENEATH.
I AM VICTORIOUS IN ALL THINGS GREAT AND SMALL FOR I AM IN THE FATHER AND HE IS IN ME.
I AM A MIGHTY, FAVORED CHILD OF THE MOST HIGH!!!
Fundraising Update: I am still in need of financial support to reach the final fundraising goal of $16,277. We are ONLY $3,393 away from reaching the goal. It is due in just 52 days on Dec. 31st. If you’d like to make a donation simply click the orange Support Me button at the top of the page or the Support Me! tab on the left side of the page. Your gift of any amount is greatly appreciated! Also, please feel free to spread the word of this need to your friends, family, and coworkers. Thank you!
