A new season started for me a few days ago. It is a season that wouldn't be my first choice but it is one i can see the Lord has been preparing me for.
When I was asked to be a team leader I took the next few hours to pray about it before I committed. In the natural, I am most comfortable following. Leading is something completely out of my comfort zone and something I rather avoid. Although this is true, I felt like the Lord had been preparing me for this and teaching me that leading is not so much about making the calls as it is about living a life of honor an humility before others, but I still didn't want to do it, so i asked Him to show me any reason why I shouldn't step into this season. Immediately i was flooded with thought of all the reasons why I am not naturally a good leader. I thought of all the things that make me uncomfortable about being a leader and all my inadequacies in it.
Then I realized this is exactly where the Lord has called me. i know this for two reasons. The first reason is that if I assess the last several months of my life, i can see Him preparing me for this and building my character in areas where it was lacking (another blog to follow with those lessons soon…hopefully). The second reason i know this is where he wants me is because i am completely inadequate to do this well on my own. I know in my own effort I am guaranteed to fail. I don't have what it takes to be good at this. The only thing i know to do is seek Him in it. It is here that I realize how much I need Him…l always need Him, but in this place, I am acutely aware of it and He likes it that way. He gets the most glory that way and that why I'm here, to reflect His light and display His glory. So…I accepted. And here I am in this new season of deeper dependence on the Lord. A season of soaking in His presence and love, because I know if i am not filled with His love then I have nothing to give to my team or anyone else. So, I'm all in and I'm embracing this journey with the Lord.
Below is a picture of my "new" team. Yep, its the same as the last 3 months except Lizi became a squad leader (we miss her so much!) and we added wonderful Ally Blackwell. I am so blessed to be able to spend my time with these 5 men and women who live a life surrendered to the Lord. They teach me so much!
I know it looks like we have a rough life! Haha. We had our month end debrief near the beach in Phuket, Thailand and we enjoyed our one day on the beach!
