God dared me to go to training camp.
I was scared.
I was certain I would fail.
I was sure I was too broken.
I was more in love with my life than I was with God.
I was not ready to give it all up.
In March of 2015, God called me out of an extremely dark season and onto the World Race. I told Him that if my application was accepted, I knew it was His calling. But when it was, I panicked. “God, for real?! Why can’t I just go for a month? The summer?! THIS IS 11 MONTHS WE’RE TALKING ABOUT HERE!” Yeah… He knew that already.
For the first time during that month, I saw these words come alive: GO therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. Matthew 28:19-20 I clung to those words everyday.
He moved mountains for me over those next 14 months, leading me out of a depression, into a perfect job that became full-time, a Bachelor’s degree earned 1.5 years early, an engagement to the man of my dreams, and the building of a Tiny House.
At that point, this whole World Race thing was simply a promise I’d made to God. It was easy to say “yes” to Him when my life was falling apart. When I felt like I had it all together, still saying “yes” to the World Race seemed impossible. The in-between time was like a never-ending waiting game, and I got caught up in the beautiful chaos of everything else life was offering…Until training camp rolled around.
On June 7th, I stuffed my Bible, journal, clothes, sleeping bag, sleeping pad, tent, and infinite amount of other (non-essential, totally unnecessary) items into my 60-liter pack and smaller daypack. (Quite frankly, this process was stressful and overwhelming and chaotic when really I lived off of about 10 items for the entire duration of camp. Future racers, just bring the BASICS: Bible, bug spray, baby wipes, done.)
In the matter of ten short (yet somehow ridiculously long) days, training camp shattered me, picked up all of my pieces, restored my heart, and made me entirely new. Well, actually God did all of that; camp was just His way of quieting my heart to let it happen.
Here’s what I learned:
- Nothing and no one but Jesus is my source of life.
- All of the blessings in life are from the Lord, but they are not eternal.
- When you surrender your pain, fear, doubt, and unforgiveness to Him, He doesn’t leave a gaping hole. He fills it with pure and undefiled JOY.
- Community and vulnerability are two of the most powerful ways God can heal.
- The Lord is my shepherd, but I had to be willing to untie myself from the fences holding me in my old life.
Jesus is not safe. He is dangerous, radical, and so worth the risk. He’s such a romantic, and He wants to show our hearts the wonder of His.
10 days and I came back FREE.
So, reader (or future Racer), where is God daring you to go? I challenge you to listen to that voice. Just leave. Go. Follow the Lord’s voice because He is calling you there for a greater purpose.
Don’t think God can change your heart in just a few days? Dare Him.
You’ll be left speechless.
