What a crazy journey this has been. I’m racking my brain for words to describe these last nine (going on ten!!) months, and I’m mostly speechless. I’m slightly nervous for the onslaught of questions soon to come because I just can’t explain everything in one sitting… or twenty. It’s been a long, most of the time wonderful, some of the time hard, and challenging journey.
First off, the biggest thank you ever for all the prayer and support. What an amazing family I have in Christ. I seriously couldn’t have done any of this without all of you. What grace I’ve received from the Lord through you all. I see it. I feel it. And it truly is amazing.
This journey has been insane because it has been nothing I expected, but everything God intended. Man, my expectations were so small, and what limits I put on God’s will. Let’s not mention my stubborn will. With much encouragement, many prayers, and great love from God and you all I am making it to the end! Here we are. Two months left.
I was immensely blessed to have Mike and Amanda with me for my last week in Guatemala. We had a ton of laughs and I’m pretty sure Mike shed a few tears when I said, “See you in two months!” I was slightly shocked that I didn’t struggle with the goodbye as much as I thought I would. On our bus ride to drop them off for the final time Mike asked me if I was sad about them leaving, and I was a little, but only because I enjoyed so much seeing them again. I wasn’t sad that I have two months of this trip left because what I learned at PVT is that I’ve missed a lot of opportunity for growth on this trip.
Example:
I’m such a prideful person. I succeed in doing what I don’t want to do, but I fail everyday do to what I want to do. Boy, Paul hit the nail on the head with that. I’ve spent so much time sitting in my pride and missing the fellowship with the followers around me. All because of pride.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve embraced a lot of things this trip has thrown at me, but one thing I didn’t fully embrace over the last nine months was learning to live and do Christ’s work in community. I noticed this when I only really introduced Mike and Amanda to a handful of my squad. I’ve failed to embrace life with them for about six months now. I’m excited that I’ve noticed and can really embrace these last two months with them. It shouldn’t matter who I’m with when we have God in common.
With that being said, it wasn’t a hard goodbye because I will see them in two months, but I only have two more months with my amazing squad that I’ve not loved very well at all. I know these last two months will bring probably the most growth of the race because I’m finally surrendering my pride of feeling entitled to pick my community, as if only a select few can truly do God’s work.
