On Friday, I had my first dance lesson in salsa. I still have a long way to go, but God showed me something about my faith in a crazy way. I was trying to learn the steps and thought I was doing fairly well, but my dance partner had to stop me. He said that I wasn’t letting him lead me. Ouch. There’s nothing like honesty from somebody you just met 5 minutes ago. Little did he know how much truth was in that statement.
For any of you that know me, you know I struggle with this. My teammates laughed at this situation because a complete stranger could point this out. It is so hard for me to be led, especially from brothers. Part of this comes from my independent nature, but the rest comes from my stubbornness (to be honest). In the past 8 months, God has been changing my view on submission to men. My flesh side wants to scream at the word “submission” because it has negative connotations to me, but the Holy Spirit is slowly chipping away at my tenseness. He is reteaching me with the Word what it really means to submit. It’s actually a beautiful thing.
Just as in the dance, I tried to do the steps on my own. I had them somewhat, but when I put those steps with another, they didn’t match. In dancing, the man is supposed to lead, but when the woman tries to do her own thing, it’s a disaster. The man cannot lead properly if the woman doesn’t fully submit and follow. DANG.
It inhibits both of them. He cannot lead her his best and she is not looking to him but to other things. In dancing, I was looking at my feet, trying to avoid a mishap. What I didn’t realize was that it hindered more than it helped. Essentially, I was relying on myself and not on trust.
How many of us look like this with Jesus? Even more than earthly relationships, Jesus is the ultimate authority. He knows all and can be trusted more than anybody, so why do I hesitate? Why do I live as if I can do things on my own, only to fall from my steps? Why am I looking down at the possible problems when I should be looking to Him for guidance?
I am nowhere near perfecting these questions or realizations, but God has me thinking. I am hindering my relationship with my brothers and even more with Jesus. The Spirit has a long way to lead me in this, but I am thrilled learning how to dance with the greatest Man ever.
