For years or really as long as I can remember, I’ve felt like a lost little girl. I constantly felt scared and unsure where to go next- like I was looking for my Daddy’s hand, but couldn’t find it. I hated that feeling and I thought I’d always feel that way.
Then Training Camp happened.
One of the most significant lessons in my life happened in the first day or two of TC. The speaker talked about grieving losses and recognizing how they’ve affected us. He talked about how we have these losses (deaths, disappointments, emotional wounds), but we spend our whole lives not dealing with them. We end up like a bucket with the hole in the bottom of it. We keep trying to be filled, but we have this leak that prevents us from being completely filled. When we’re not filled, we’re unable to give and to love others the way we’re supposed to.
So we spent some time listing all of our losses, our disappointments, our emotional wounds. I tried to start chronologically, but ended up just writing things down. After we listed what we could, we broke into smaller groups of 7-8 people. Then we said them out loud. We went around in a circle and just shared. This was not a time to counsel each other or respond to what was said. Just sharing.
My heart was completely broken for these girls.
My heart was quite broken too. I’d prayed about some of these wounds over the years, but it was more from a place of, “Let me just get over this, God”. This time was so beautiful because it was an acknowledgement that these things had hurt us. We had scars. But it was also a place of, “Despite these wounds, Jesus, let me forgive these people”. It led to such a beautiful place of healing. We grieved these hurts. We cried. A lot.
The we looked to our Creator and Healer to heal us.
And He did.
Once we acknowledged these hurts and got them out in the open, we could forgive. They no longer had power over us. God made us whole. I don’t feel like that lost little girl anymore. My favorite thing about God (currently…and maybe for always) is His ability to heal these deep hurts, these things that we think we’ll NEVER get past, and He makes us whole. He makes all things new. He redeems us.
And that is the message I want to take to the nations.
I want to see Jesus heal peoples’ hearts. I want to see forgiveness overflow. And I want to see the freedom that comes from that.
What about you? Are there losses/wounds that you haven’t grieved (processed)? Are they still affecting how you react to situations or how you live life? Jesus longs to heal. He wants to redeem those hurts. He wants to make you whole.
If you want to talk more about this or if I can pray for you, please let me know! I have been loved fiercely and healed and I want you to know Jesus offers that to you too.
