I stared out the window at the swirling snow, stared at the thrashing pines, stared at the window, stared at my faint reflection and realized the winter weather outside matched the turmoil in my head, the storm outside balancing the tempest inside. Memories of the past year mingle with the questions of the future and I can’t seem to focus on just one, can’t quite catch the answers and I hope the tempest will pass and the snow and questions will settle and give me a chance to relax, time to sift through them, to see them one at a time.
I shake my head like a snow globe, I stir it all up again, is this really how I am feeling? Once again I underestimated how difficult re-entry would be. Things that NEED to be done, sit, things left undone. Where are we headed? What are we going to do now? Still, unanswered.
What did you learn? Did you achieve what you were looking for? How did it change you? What was your favorite place? What was the weirdest food you ate? What is it like to be back in this culture? How did this effect your marriage?
Everyday the answer changes, as I remember a story, or as my mood changes. The answers change depending on who I am talking to.
Everyday some clarity comes, some motivation, keep putting one foot in front of the other, again, hoping the path rises in response.
As I type, I am sitting on a stool in the basement. David Gray’s old songs compete with the furnace for my thoughts. I am trying to dislodge some of this writer’s block, and I am trying to get motivated to workout.
In Hong Kong, Seth told us about Hemingway’s book, “Moveable Feast” (I hope that is correct), that Hemingway was telling about the writing process and said to free up writer’s block, just write one true sentence. Hmmm. Oops, I have to tell this joke: how does an engineer work out constipation? (answer at the end of the blog).
So what are some true things I can put here? How to start cleaning up the rubble in my head?
More thanks.
We are so thankful to our friends and family for all the love and support they have shown us. My mom is actually letting Sequoia in the house, in the room we are staying in. Mom and Dad, thank you for the meals and the room.
To my Mom and Dad on the Anderson side, thank you for the love and support, especially all the hard work you put in this year helping us with stuff here at home and all the financial stuff. Thankyou for offering a room too.
We are thankful to our family/church in Wilmington for the love we felt when we saw all of you, and just (maybe more?) as thankful for the generous financial gift we received when we came home to help us ‘adjust’. Thank you.
Thanks also to our church in Braintree for the support.
To the Obloms, again, thank you for taking such good care of our baby, I think she misses you.
To friends and family who have given us some gifts (Beck and Bern) fed us and bought beers for us (almost everyone), we are thankful. I still have, to the tune of Tom Petty’s song where he says he is ‘free falling’, I am singing ‘freeloading’. So thanks for not actually making us feel like freeloaders, and let us know when we are actually….
I wonder if I should do more of this on the next blog, yeah, cut this one short.
Oh yeah, thanks to all of you who read this, especially thanks to all those who have encouraged us this year…I hope for those of you who actually enjoy this stuff, that I will keep working and putting stuff up that is worth the time and fun to read.
The answer to the trivia question is with a pencil.
