Seth spoke on God’s process of our lives. The stages of discipleship. Brokenness. Seth asked us about our broken dreams, how it made us feel when dreams broke. Our first real broken heart.
Seth spoke about his dream, what he is living for. I thought about my dream, about Garth Brook’s “A Dream is Like a River”. I thought of Billy Joel, “River of Dreams”. David Grey, “Flesh”, where he sings of the idea of putting flesh on the bones of his dreams.
It seems that life depends on our ability to dream, our hope to dream. Living with a capacity, a faith to pursue a dream. Martin Luther King, Jr., he had a dream. Paul of Tarsus had something he lived for, something he died for.
I am pursuing a dream, living a life of broken dreams, even as I hope for a clear dream. My dream changes all the time. Every country we live in changes my dream. Every experience shapes me, my dream, my capacity and willingness to dream.
Seth shared his dream of a generation come fully alive. A generation awake to their destiny. Seth has pursued this dream for 17 years, I believe. He said he has felt frustrated. He gave an illustration of the generation like unpopped popcorn. Here and there a person pops into who they can be, but most of the people just refuse to pursue who God wants them to be.
When Seth finished speaking, Andrew stood up. Andrew said the boomer generation has been unpopped kernels. That there is hope for today’s generation. I don’t even know what generation that is, I am guessing it is generation ‘next’, because generation X has mostly sat stagnant, I believe.
Andrew had Seth stand up. He used Seth as a demonstration of a man who is pursuing his dreams. A man who speaks from experience, who speaks from who he is. A man who understands, as Ghandi did, that “ONE’S LIFE IS ONE’S MESSAGE”.
I sat with Andrew on Thursday. He asked how I was doing. He repeated that he was proud of me. How many men understand how good that feels? How many men are hungry to hear from their dad or another father figure that they are proud of him? I am so blessed to hear that from the men in my life who I respect. It feels corny, but so many men who I respect have said that. My heart, like many other testosterone laden hearts are hungry to hear this. I hear it from the men here, I hear it from my clients, I heard it from Ken Ings, I hear it from my dad. They are proud of me! I need to let this absorb, become part of who I am. To understand that God is proud of me. Let these people be my judge, not my warped self concept. Not what people I don’t even know have to say about me. Trust what God has to say. Trust God is saying this through men I respect and trust.
Andrew repeated that he wants us to continue life’s journey with them. Every thing in me says “yes”. But I am just not sure. I say I have not heard God’s voice, but mostly I am not sure I have what it takes. I need to trust God’s voice through the men I trust. It is so difficult. I tell Andrew my crazy dreams. He says they sound great and he can help, we can work together.
For so long God has been the product of theological debates in my life. Heated arguments, people with different views on what or who God is, and what and who God wants us to be. Often this is like arguing politics with a person who doesn’t vote. A waste of time.
Learning to look for the evidence of God in people’s lives. The fruit being produced. Other people’s lives changed. Destinies improved because of the involvement of the person in someone else’s live.
I am not a theologian. I get confused by people’s biblical arguments. But I know what I see. What I see in my involvement with these men and their families, the people at AIM, is fruit. People truly living their lives for God, not hollow and deceptive arguments, not hypocritical lifestyles. Changing other people’s destinies. Pursuing God’s dreams in their own lives, and helping other people to dream, to pursue their dreams.
So I pursue a dream I am not sure of. I dream of others holding on to their dreams. Maybe that is where we are headed, just encouraging others to keep their dreams alive. We don’t have to become jaded and cynical. I have to pursue a dream, live a dream, speak of the dream, struggle to keep it alive. To make our lives, to make our marriage, our message.
That is something I can understand.
“ONE’S LIFE IS ONE’S MESSAGE”
