God's timing is ALWAYS perfect.
I would be lying if I didn't say that I'm not nervous to leave for 11 months or I'm not dreading the time I will spend away from my family. And lately it has increased so much that I was doubting myself and doubting God's calling for me. And I know that Satan will do anything to make me fall away from the Lord. And he has been working hard these last few weeks. Everything that could go wrong has, and everything that was going well turned for the worst.
3 times a week we go to a "chapel" service. And this week is Mission's Emphasis Week, where missionaries from different organizations come and "recruit" and help move peoples dreams of becoming a missionary forward. And every Tuesday night we have hall meeting where our floor of girls meet for about an hour or so. Well tonight at hall meeting a missionary from GEM came to tell us her story, the story how she became a missionary in Slovenia.
At the being I thought to myself, "ok I hope this goes by fast I have alot to do." But God quickly took those thoughts out of my head as I heard her story. The purpose of the story was to keep moving forward, and don't doubt yourself and what you are being called too. This past week I have doubted raising support, I have doubted my emotional support of my friends and family. I have doubting everything! But if I don't move forward, I will be bitter with myself for passing up an opportunity that is all I could dream about.
And after hearing her story and talking to her a bit. Yes I will miss my family, yes I will miss the holidays and birthdays and family gatherings. I will miss my friends from school, and defining moments in my family members and friends lives. But I have to remember that even though I will miss that stuff, I have to remember all the things that I will gain during those 11 months. I know that its not going to always be fun or always be easy but I know that God opened this door for a reason that I have yet to find. I feel more content and more relaxed about my decision.
I have decided to go on the World Race. I have decided to let God work through me in 11 different countries. I have decided to trust in the Lord, and see what he has in store for me. I have decided to proceed through the open door he has provided me with, in order help change myself and the world!
I am blessed to experience this with my squad and family and friends through blogs.
Thanks for the prayers and support, it means alot to me.
