After training camp, the Lord has filled me with this overwhelming sense of peace that I have never felt before in my life. Up until a week before my show, I did not stress at all, took everything easy, and knew that I was going to have no trouble whatsoever with my show because the Lord was by my side. Wrong.
I was supposed to install 34 pieces in the Union University Gallery space on Tuesday, November 6th, and I believe I had all of the pieces done by the 4th, wahoo! Now the tough part came: hanging them. Because I had absolutely no area of expertise in this, I asked my father to help me (a.k.a. papa white). In the beginning it was fairly easy, until the unbelievable happened. One piece broke about 24 hours before my show, while another fell from the ceiling and shattered 5 hours before my show. To say I was stressed was an understatement!
I began to get really upset, question the Lord's motives, and complain: "I trusted you the whole time throughout this process, I relied solely on you, was completely lost in your presence, and now this!! Ahh what are you teaching me? Patience?!" The more and more I began to question Him, the more things broke or shattered and I had to start the process all over again.
About halfway through these escapades where I would start a piece over fresh, I began to realize that I was spending more time with my dad that I had in a long time. We literally spent every morning together, and every night, either at our house drilling holes, driving to school, or in the studio trying to hang the pieces. I began to realize that if it wasn't for all of these things breaking, I would not have gotten to spend all this time with my father. My frustration grew to peace once more, and I actually began enjoying the last pieces I had to redo!
Now it was time for the show…
Being the artist, I knew I enjoyed the work, but I had no idea how other's would interpret it. In short, the show embodied an interpretation of my own lack of control that I have for a virus I've carried in my cornea for 12 years, and comparing it to the lack of control that I enjoy in the art making process. The pieces all began by resembling cornea's, using colors that were in my hazel eyes, then adding in more colors and mediums to add an effect that gave the pieces "Minds of Their Own" during the drying process. These new cornea's changed over periods of weeks, even months, and began this journey of abstraction where the only thing recognizable was color. The vision I see out of my eye is strictly color, with vague hints of shapes. Therefore these pieces began to embody the little vision that I have. As an artist, it was an emotional process that I thoroughly enjoyed, and could in many ways label it my own art therapy at times (which I want to be someday, and plan on using on the race with people we come in contact with). In the end, my show was 10 million, trillion, gazilion times more exciting than I could have ever imagined!!
I was completely walking in favor when I saw the many faces that came to support me, which included most of the art department at Union, many dear friends of myself and my parents, my best friends from Memphis, my best friend and old roommate who drove from Knoxville, my 91 year old grandfather who can barely get around, a lady I worked for housesitting who has become a dear friend, Jazmine, her boyfriend Thomas and two kids, and the many artists who have contributed to my life: Lendon Noe, Melody Weintraub, and Jenna Fergus. I could not get over the inumerous amounts of sincere comments praising my work, as well as the many tear-jerking remarks my painting teacher, Mr. Nadaskay, made concerning my heart and love for helping others.
It was the best night of my life.
In the end, I want to remind you guys reading this that if you are ever going through any trials or tribulations of any kind: the Lord has a MUCH BIGGER plan that we can ever, ever begin to read. With me, my struggles led to a stronger, more indepth relationship with my father, that I am so blessed by. For someone else, it may mean working longer hours at work, getting a speeding ticket, or unfortunately being sick. Instead of complaining about the area we are stuck in, we could see it as more time to spend with coworkers showing God's love, the Lord telling us to slow down because He wants more individual time with us, or using our sickness to witness to those around us to not take life for granted. Though it is hard to look at situations positively, that's how the Lord sees them, and we should strive to be more like Him on a daily basis. I made a mistake, doubted, feared, but in the end the Lord prevailed. So don't lose heart! After every bad thing comes a blessing in disguise!!!
“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalm 139:14
Here are some pictures of my show.
