Give it up (Fasting)

In my last post, I wrote about what God has been teaching me recently about surrender. Last Tuesday, I was in a bit of a funk. I had been faced with a lot of discouragment from friends and family about going on the Race. I cried out to God. I decided to fast (as a side note: here's some info on fasting that may be helpful if you are curious about this practice) for the first time, as a demonstration of my dependency on God and my trust in Him to provide. It was an incredible experience. God used fasting to humble me and reveal his healing power. Confession: food is an area of sin for me. When I am stressed, I turn to chocolate and other treats for comfort, rather than seeking comfort in the Lord. On Tuesday, I heard about something that made me very hurt and angry. Then I was left alone in my apartment. I was just steps away from my kitchen, where I habitually would turn to for comfort. It was so hard in that moment to take over my mind and make the decision to hold to my fast. I admit, I walked into and out of the kitchen once or twice before sitting down on the couch with my Bible. I read Scripture, listened to worship music, and prayed, even though at times I was lost for words. God showed up big time! I am still amazed by the overwhelming calm and peace that flooded me. God dissolved my anger and healed my hurt. 

Not only was it incredible to experience God's grace through my fast, but it has left me with a reminder of how great God is and how only He can bring us joy and peace and comfort. Whenever I had sought comfort from sweets, I was only left feeling sick and guilty on top of everything else.Through spending time with the Lord, I experienced complete healing. Beautiful. Thank you Jesus. 

In light of everything I have been learning about surrendering and God's provision, I have decided to fast from all sweets until I leave for the Race. Woah. I shock myself as I write this. Honestly, it is going to be extremely difficult for me to continuously turn down offers of sweets and still more challenging, despite my experience last week (oh how quickly and easily we forget all that the Lord has done for us), to resist the temptation to seek comfort from food when I'm upset. This is why I am declaring my fast to all of you, dear friends, so that you can keep me accountable in this devotion. 

Jesus, I choose you. I love you so much more than I love chocolate. Lord, give me the strength to fight my flesh, because I am so very weak. Reveal yourself to me as I seek your face through this sacrifice. Jesus, you sacrificed so much more in order to give me, a sinner, life. God, thank you so much! Your love astounds me. Help me to love like you first loved me. Amen.