I am a busy person by nature. I do not remember a time in my life when I have not been involved in a million different things. That’s how God made me. If it sounds like fun (and sometimes even if it doesn’t) I want to be involved. I think in middle school I was invovled in so many clubs that on the day they took pictures for the Yearbook I missed all but one class.
In one sense, this can be glorifying to God. I am passionate and enthusiastic and I God likes me using those gifts from him. In another sense, it is my greatest struggle. “Be STILL and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10)” is probably the hardest verse in the bible for me to obey.
Earlier this week I went from busy to un-busy for the first time in my entire life. Two of my three jobs ended. I now work at church 20 hours a week. And that is it.
Yes, I have gotten to spend more time with God. That’s been good. I have also read a book and a half and spent 7 hours at the gym. And, I’m starting my acting career as Rita the Cowgirl during Vacation Bible School next week (that really doesn’t relate, but it is a fun fact… I get to wear cowboy boots and everything!)
Free time is very weird for me.
Know what else I did to fill my time? I picked a fight… seems logical right?
I have a great friend who I talk to a whole lot. On the same day that I started my new life as “still” person, they started working 14 hours a day. We have talked for maybe an hour total this whole week, and usually it’s on the run.
I have been feeling left behind. And it stinks.
Tonight we basically had a fight about it. Not gonna lie, I started it. Turns out, I don’t like free time… which led to feeling left behind, feeling like an obligation and feeling like I’m the only one who is struggling with this shift in our friendship.
Oh yeah, and casting blame, cause obviously this couldn’t be my fault for not relying enough on God when I felt lonely… I did not produce good fruits of the spirit (Galatians 5:22). I did not tame my tongue (James Chapter 3). I was hurting and did not portray myself in anything less than a spastic light. Whoops!
So the flip side of the busy coin basically stinks right now. But its making me wonder…
First, Who are the people in my life that are left behind? Who do I overlook because I am so busy living life?
Secondly, Who are the people we as Christians overlook? The poor and the sick? Orphans? All of the above? I’m imagining that this feeling might be somewhat what it’s like to be homeless… the world is moving so fast… people are busy with their lives…. And all you have is time and this feeling that you’ve been left behind.
God himself tells us to Be Still and truthfully His Kingdom will only benefit as we take the time to look around for the left behind sheep and listen to Him…
But why is it so tough to slow down?
