As I am watching "Man on Fire" with my team one of my team mates was playing Tetris. As I sit and try to focus on both things at once I keep reverting back to the game. It used to be one of my favorite games to play on my phone and gameboy. There are times where he continues to go and go and keeps fitting the pieces together perfectly. And then there are games he tries and tries and the pieces won't fit. Sometimes he is really trying and sometimes he is focused on the movie at the same time. The blocks get by him and build up in places where they do not exactly fit. It builds up frustration and a little anxiety because he knows the game is coming to an end faster then he would like.
At times my journey on this race feels like a game of Tetris. There are days that I can genuinely fit all pieces together spiritually, physically and emotionally as a team member. I finish my day refreshed and I can go to bed knowing that I was challenged but in my mind fit the pieces of life perfectly together to make me feel like my journey on this race is growing. Then there are days, we all have I'm sure, where I get distracted and the pieces do not fit and build up on one another. I tend to loose track and focus on other things. I think that I can do it on my own and evidently I can not because the pieces do not fit. They do not go together and it is frustrating. I know there are times when I used to play Tetris where when I saw I was going to loose I gave up. No matter if I knew I could try harder to put the lines, squares and L-shapes together I gave up. I was just looking at my own understanding to figure it out. When all you have to do is twist them around to fit.
I laugh sometimes thinking how stubborn I am with God. I laugh because I am wrong and he has so much grace for me. He tells me to turn the shapes of life to fit together but I refuse because I either disagree or want to do it on my own time. I think I know how to do it or know if the L-shape lays down then it won't make a perfect line. The thing is we are not perfect nor do we have perfect "lines" in our life. We will never have perfect days but we absolutely can not do it without God. I absolutely can not go a day on this race with God.
*If you are a future racer you can not go a day not listening to God or relying on him. Sometimes days you may feel like you can but honestly you can't and do not come into the race thinking that you can.
