runs through my veins, so I brought one of my favorite movies/stories along
with me: Pride and Prejudice. It’s
the adaptation starring Keira Knightley; here’s a chunk of dialogue from one of
the more striking scenes (to me, anyway):
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“My dear Lizzie, I’ve come here to tell you the news. Mr. Collins and I are engaged.”
“Engaged?”
“Yes.”
“To be married?”
“Yes, of course, Lizzie, what other kind of engaged is
there?
Oh for heaven’s sake, Lizzie, don’t look at me like
that.
There was no earthly reason why I shouldn’t be happy with
him as any other.”
“But he’s ridiculous!”
“Oh, hush. Not all
of us can afford to be romantic.
I’ve been offered a comfortable home and protection.
There’s a lot to be thankful for.”
“Charlotte. . .”
“I’m 27 years old. I’ve no money and no prospects.
I’m already a burden to my parents. And I’m frightened.
So don’t judge me, Lizzie, don’t you dare judge me.”
You’d
think that it’s been about three hundred years since Jane Austen’s been alive
and since then, feminism in the western part of the world has empowered women
thus making this kind of conversation moot. Marriage is no longer a means of survival for women. Yet it still feels that way sometimes, I imagine,
even when a woman has all the best friends she can hope for, a great career, a
fabulous wardrobe, a home of her own. . . well, I know I’ve imagined myself
saying something similar to what Charlotte says.
Here I
am: 16 hours away from home, 25 years old, little money in my personal account
and living off of the generous stewardship of others, without prospects because
I made a covenant to be wholly His and to respect and honor the men of the
g-squad as my brothers in Christ. I’m
still trying to walk in the freedom to receive my parents’ gift of bearing my
financial obligations while on the Race; figuring out how to be independent
again post-Race is gonna be a whole other can of worms.
There are
many lessons to be learned from this story, even for men. For example, Mr. Bennet failed as a father
when he let Lydia go off to Brighton instead of keeping her home. Rather than choosing to protect his daughter
and uphold his family’s honor, he preferred peace and quiet. If you’ve had the pleasure of reading this
book, you can imagine that if Lydia stayed home, the family would’ve spared
themselves much grief, shame, trouble and worry.
Just
remember that fellas when y’all have daughters someday. Read the book; it’s not “chick lit,” aside
from the Bible, it can be a great source of insight.
Anyhow. Before
the World Race ever entered my mind as a way of life, what Charlotte felt were
real fears for me. Even though I knew
that obedience brings blessing, a part of me feared that stepping out into
missions would exclude hopes for marriage. But I don’t anymore.
I am
going to soak in the freedom I have as God’s Beloved, the apple of His eye, as
His precious daughter. I am called to
extend His kingdom in all kinds of ways, and only when I’ve given all of myself
to Him can I be fully used. This year of
my life is my alabaster jar, and I gladly break it open and pour it out,
anointing His feet.
So
friends back home, don’t even bother asking me (anymore) about any of guys on
our squad in that way. Don’t even hint
at it. But thanks, though. I know you love me and mean well.
But I am
more than fine. I know whoever God has
for me is gonna make Mr. Darcy look like a dweeb in comparison – and Mr. Darcy
isn’t even real. The author and
perfecter of my faith has my back, and that includes the love of my life.
