We just arrived safely to Haiti late Friday night. We had about a 5 hour bus ride to the boarder of the DR and then after a couple of hours of trying to get through security we were able to cross into Haiti. Were staying at an amazing ministry called “Mission of Hope Haiti.”
check out our amazing ministry here: http://www.mohhaiti.org
The whole squad is together this month so I’m really excited to see how The Lord is gonna grow us together and work through us together throughout the duration of this month. Before I get too far into being in Haiti though, I want to share what The Lord has taught me and shown me through my first month of squad leading in the Dominican Republic.
“Being humbled and reminded”…
Well, my first month for squad leading has already came to an end. I have learned a lot this month from the Lord in what it means to be a squad leader for the squad that I am blessed to lead and most of all serve.
I have learned that ministry looks a lot different being a squad leader as it does than it did on my first world race as a racer. Ministry from being a squad leader are not set times, but can go very late at night and happen very early in the morning. Ministry is organic and looks like many different shapes and sizes. It looks logistical and even administrative when you’re having many meetings and planning events and schedules for your squad. At times it can seem like you are a counselor and a conflict manager dealing with different issues between people on the teams or squad as a whole. Ministry can also seem a lot like being a pastor at times where people come to you for spiritual advice in asking for help to grow closer to God.
This month I have faced questions and issues where at times I didn’t know how to answer or direct, but in the midst of this I believe I am learning to use a key to the kingdom that I haven’t always used very well. I’m learning on how to listen.
I’m learning not only how to listen to people when they come to me for help in the natural, but also to listen in the spiritual. I’m learning that as I listen to people and their stories, I am also listening to the Holy Spirit as they talk. As they talk to me, I am asking God to show me the root of their problems and asking God to give me the questions to ask them in return. I then listen to the Holy Spirit as He speaks and reveals things that only He can as my squad mates and others talk to me so when I answer them and provide them with advice, It’s not advice only from what I have learned, but advice from what God is speaking and teaching.
I am learning that as an older brother to O Squad, 40 sisters and 10 brothers in Christ, I need to learn how to listen a lot, especially when talking with my sisters.
I think in the past I have always wanted to force things and push things on people in a way to help them grow or become better, but I can’t take people to a place they are not ready to go to. I am learning that the best thing I can do is to listen intentionally to them as a friend and help them know that they are not alone in what they are facing or going through. I am then learning to not just give them the advice that they want or need, but to let them wrestle with the issue a bit and encourage them to go to our Father to rest in His presence within the storm or issue that they are facing.
I’m learning that when we are in storms within our lives that our first motive should not be to stop the storm, but to rest in the storm and ask The Lord what he is teaching us through the storm.
This can be really hard. But when we do it and walk through the fire or the trial that we are facing, we not only come out brighter, stronger, and closer to God, but we also come out trusting our Father more.
Imagine a Father asking his little girl to jump into a pool into his arms trusting that He will catch her. If she does it, she not only confronts her fears, but she learns how to have a deeper dependence in her Father and his love for her through the process of him catching her.
This happened to me this month. One day I was working construction and really hurt my finger. I smashed my finger nail so bad that it dug into my cuticle and instantly made my finger swell up and bleed a lot. Before I knew it, ten minutes later I was on the ground because I fainted. Then I was being taken to the doctor where I had to get 6 shots and had to have my entire nail removed. It’s still swollen and not in the greatest shape as I type this. At times this past week since I got hurt, it has been very humbling.
Even though there was a lot of pain and I do wish my finger was healed, there have been lessons that I have learned from it and a deeper intimacy with my God and Savior that I have been given through the process that have made it all worth it.
Not only has God shown me things about my heart and his love for me that I haven’t received before, but through the process I have experienced a love from my squad more than I would have ever expected. When I fainted a nurse and EMT from our squad rushed to my aid. Then two other nurses from our squad have helped changed my bandage multiple times a day, along with people praying for me, going to the hospital with me, and blessing me with notes and gifts.
Through this process I have been humbled. I have had to ask people to tie my shoes, help pack and carry my pack, and serve me in ways I am not used to being served. Jesus said that he didn’t come to be served but to serve others. We;; it’s funny how things work out sometimes because I came to serve and be there for O squad as a squad leader, mentor, brother, and friend. Yet through this first month, they have been there for me and shown me a love that has brought me deeper and closer to them and my Father through the process,
This lesson of humility and growth has given me a chance to face fears that have held me back in life while yet realizing how fragile our bodies, this life, and even our “world races” are. I know I just hurt my finger and had my nail removed and that is nothing compared to what so many other people have gone through, but it was a humbling reminder of how out of control of our lives and bodies that we truly are within this life.
It has been a reminder to cherish each day as the true gift of life that it is. I am learning to love more deeply than I ever have before, while also learning to receive love more than I ever have before as well. Storms are not always fun, but I’m learning to rest in God’s presence through them which is changing me within the process.
So even though month one seemed heavy at times facing different issues and even some injuries, I can honestly say that I feel closer to God and have a deeper intimacy, joy, love, and trust with him from it.
So no matter where you are in this great big world and no matter what you are going through, know that you are not alone through the process. Choose to believe and trust that you have a Father that loves you and who is inviting you to face your fears, to leap into his arms, and to trust in Him and his love in a deeper way than you ever have before.
He hears your cry and He sees you. Listen for his voice whispering to you that you’re not alone!
As I began to faint after hurting my finger everything around me began to turn black. But my friend from the squad who was an EMT named Lindsey spoke to me and said, “Ryan, listen to my voice, listen to my voice and choose to come back to me.”
All I could see was the outline of her face, yet everything was black. When everything inside my mind and body was telling me to go to sleep, suddenly I heard her voice telling me to listen to her, and something in me said, “stop, CHOOSE to wake up.” Slowly I began to come back to consciousness and I was able to see again.
God speaks to us friends. If you’re facing a storm in life right now or even working a job that you hate and don’t know what your purpose in life is, stop and listen to his voice. Choose to come back to the one who hears you and sees you, no matter how dark the tunnel feels around you.
Your Father God is here to help you. Know and trust that He fights for you every step of the way. He will never leave you no matter how bad the storms are and no matter how dark the tunnel gets. God’s light will always shine and His voice will always speak. God’s love will never end, it will always endure, always hope, always, believe, our Father’s love, will never fail!
– 1 Corinthians 13: 7
BELIEVE, TRUST, and HOPE….YOU ARE NEVER ALONE
Joshua 1:9, Deuteronomy 31:8, Matthew 28: 20, and Hebrews 13:5
