Coming into India, I came in with resentment toward three of my teammates that I grew close with in Moldova. In Ireland we were together as a squad and it hinder my relationship with my team due to business. I took my teammates lack of commitment to our team as a personal blow. I thought if they don’t care enough about our team to be purposeful with each other than I won’t care either. So I kept that same attitude and mindset into India when we would be a team again.
We were no longer with 50 other people that they could hang out with and no longer were we in a city but in a small village. I felt like now that all those distraction are gone, that they wanted to befriend me and build a relationship. I’m not about that life!
I wasn’t as playful with them as I had been or intentional about our relationship. I think it was day 3, that I blew up on my team leader during team time. Tensions were HIGH! That night, he pulled me aside and we talked it out and our relationship began to grow again.
However, with the other two I took a lot longer and for one of them I didn’t reconcile with them and confront them until Nepal. She had no idea why I wasn’t acting myself with her and was oblivious to my perspective. Because I didn’t reconcile with them earlier, I missed out on deepening our relationship during our time in India. If I hadn’t been so stubborn then we could have been a greater impact during ministry as well.
So now you know the truth, I’m messed up! Yes, I am a missionary currently but I’m still trying to figure out how to do life with people. One main thing that I learned and I am continually learning on the race is that confrontation is not a bad thing. We just have been taught that we should avoid it but we need to clear the air because miscommunication and distorted perspectives can burn the bridge to our relationships.
Speak up!
Be Bold!
Be Honest!
And ultimately come from a place of Love!
