Warning: I’m writing this blog in an attempt to stay awake long enough to fight jet lag. It takes time to get to the other side of the world; and, when you do finally make it, you realize that you’ve missed an entire day (Saturday) and your ankles have swollen to a size best described as “ouch.”
It’s fair to say I won’t be proofreading this one very carefully.
For the past 10 years, I’ve spent September starting the school year with my students. This year, I packed a ridiculously small number of things in a ridiculously large backpack and started the World Race! I’m happy to report that we arrived safely in Manila this morning at KIM’s (Kids International Ministries) base. Our squad has a day of rest and preparation before my team heads to the island of Mindanao to minister with KIM for the rest of the month. (Note to ankles: get ready for another plane ride!)
Travelling to the Philippines takes awhile and plane rides provide ample time for thinking; so, I’ve been trying to wrap my mind around all that God’s done restoring my past and how he’s preparing my future with the race. And I’ve come to a very important conclusion:
I’m not that smart and I’m not supposed to be.
And that’s not the jet lag talking, it’s a fact. In Isaiah 55:8, God tells us, “my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways.” But sometimes I try to piece it all together anyway. When you can see the picture coming together (like when I got engaged last week), praising God is an easy extravagance and it feels great. But, sitting on a plane, fighting the fear that maybe all the sacrifices aren’t going to be worth it in the end, struggling to understand why you’re here instead of at home with everything and everyone familiar- well, that doesn’t feel very good at all. But choosing to trust God’s plans when you can’t figure any of them out, well, that’s the highest praise I can give to the One who’s called me on this crazy adventure in the first place. So I've spent this week choosing praise, and I'm choosing to focus on how God is loving me right now in the present.
As we were reminded at launch, God is good and I can trust him. Once I let go of trying to figure everything out, I ended up relaxing a lot and God gave me some great times of private worship and prayer during the plane rides. This song is one of my new favorites, so, enjoy!
"I lean not on my own understanding, my life is in the hands of the Maker of Heaven."
