With only four months to go and seven months under my belt, it’s safe to say that community living has had its ups and downs. We’ve all made mistakes, sinned a little bit, been wounded a little bit and done some of the wounding. My team mates, my leaders, and even myself are not exempt. I mean, we are humans…living and working with each other 24/7….
But regardless of all that, I’ve decided that I refuse to let anything that’s happened stop me from continuing to pursue Christ-like community with my team for the rest of the race. So after having a conversation with my girls about what “feedback” should actually look like on our team and with this resolve, I wrote the following about what I desire to be within my team and what I want my team to be like.
Of course, I hope and pray that this will be true of my team mates, or any World Racer for that matter, but even if it’s not – this is my standard that I hope to achieve with the Holy Spirit’s help. This is what I will confess and declare until it becomes truth in my life and my community.
So here goes…
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I am dedicated to my team.
I want us to be the unified Body that Christ desires us to be.
I want us to be a team that uses our God-given abilities and spiritual gifts to serve God and the nations.
I am willing to do whatever it takes.
If I sleep less – so be it. If I don’t ALWAYS get what I need – it’s OK – so long as I am loving my team well. If it means I spend intentional time with my whole team more than once per day – great. If it means taking an hour for feedback before dinner for feedback and an hour after dinner to grow together in Bible study – I will not complain. I will gladly engage and be entirely present because my desire is to grow and see my friends grow in Christ. If it means weekly intentional one-on-one time with each team mate, then I will try my best to make that a reality.
I determine to have a good attitude toward feedback – giving it when it’s hard and receiving it when it’s hard. Even when it is not given in a way that I deem loving enough, I will trust the Holy Spirit in my team mate, and I will not immediately reject anything unless it directly opposes God’s Word.
I will always be open and transparent with my team about what I’m walking through, knowing that my struggles are valid, my viewpoints are valid, and that my team has been entrusted by God to speak life to those things.
I will share my victories with my team as well as my burdens.
I will ask questions to draw things out of my team mates, and I will be slow to assume and quick to ask questions about intentions, purposes and the heart behind speech and actions from my team mates.
I will not gossip. I will utilize the “24-Hour Rule,” and handle my conflicts biblically by going directly to the person I have an issue with and only involving others if the conflict persists. However, I commit to transparency to the whole team whenever I have a conflict with one other person or several. The whole team will know general details about any interpersonal conflicts that have the potential to affect the dynamic or emotional environment of the team.
I will trust the Lord to provide me with discernment on when to speak and be silent, but I will err on the side of speaking up, refusing to give the devil a foothold through my silence.
I will not be afraid to make mistakes, and I will own up to it when I am wrong. I will always be open to being called out on my sin, painful as it may be, because I know that sin is what keeps me from Christ. I will never refuse Biblical accountability.
I will expect grace and give grace, understanding that grace is costly and should never be abused. If I am wrong, I will not continue in sin that grace may abound.
Even if my words or actions are justifiable and were done out of right intention, I will always look for a balance or way to improve as to love my sisters and brothers better.
I will always do my best to never become a snare or a stumbling block for my team mates, and if I ever unintentionally become one, I will make every effort to change in order to love them better.
I will make every effort to love – remembering that God’s love is always patient and kind, never self-seeking, never boasts and does not keep record of wrongs.
I will not keep record of wrongs. I will forgive quickly – remembering that forgiveness is a choice and Christ first forgave me.
I will look to meet the needs of my team mates, trusting God to meet my needs.
I will love my team as I love myself – not forsaking my intimate time with the Lord and seeking Him first.
I will always be willing and available to pray for my team mates. I will be mindful that both me and my team mates are just human – made in God’s image and redeemed by Christ, but yet living in a fallen world. I will not forget to minister to them, remembering that they are people too. We are called to minister to each other, just like we are called to minister to the nations. I will intercede for my team, both individuals and the whole, asking God for unity.
I will not give up on anyone.
I will always put my hope in Christ, not in my team mates.
I will refuse to allow myself or any of my team mates to finish these 11 months as the same people we were before we left or any less free than we started.
I will be an open vessel in the hands of the Lord – always willing to be His hands and His feet.
I will experience community the way He intended, and it will be because I was willing to be His instrument and trust Him with my team and my life.
