The World Race is about stepping out on the edge and fully trusting in what the Lord has for you. It can be anywhere from trusting that you are suppose to go on this trip or just being bold enough to pray for someone you meet in passing. Last month in Zambia, I faced a different kind of fear. A fear that I though was of heights turned out to be a fear of falling.
One of the seven wonders of the world, Victoria Falls, is located on the border of Zambia and Zimbabwe. We lived in Livingstone where Victoria Falls is located and all month we had talk of going there. Two of my teammates mentioned the bungee and had planned on doing it at the end of our month in Zambia.
The whole month I went back and forth on if I wanted to do the jump. They had a package deal where you can zip line, bungee jump and gorge swing. The morning of our trip to the falls the first thing I said to my teammate Kaci was, “I am NOT doing any activities at the falls.” I was dead set on this answer until we walked up the steps to the shop near the bridge where you jump off. As everyone was paying for their activities, I thought to myself, “Am I going to regret not trying this or experiencing this?” I went for the package deal knowing that I have this fear of falling and I was going to conquer it!
There were seven of us girls that signed up for the full package. I did the zip line it was great. It was just one line across the gorge. We got to the bridge and everyone had already jumped before me. I got strapped up and waddled to the edge of the platform with my heart beating out of my chest. They told me to stand up straight and put my toes off the edge. I couldn’t do it. I choked. I said, “No,” and waddled back to the bench and had them unstrap me.
As I backed away from the platform, shaking from fear with tears running down my face, all I could think was that I had failed. I didn’t do what I set out to do. My teammate, Troy, who has a fear of heights comforted me and said that it was okay that I backed out. I made it further than he would have and got up there and at least tried. In that moment, I was still focused on not doing the jump rather than the truth that I tried my best.
The rest of the girls did their gorge swing and it was only Kaci and me left to jump. I looked at her and asked if she would mind going with me since they allowed pairs. We got strapped up together and practiced the technique on how to step off the bridge. This time I was going to make the jump. I had no choice or Kaci would bring me down with her. There we were with nothing but our toes holding onto the edge for dear life. Three, two, one, step! I did it! I made the jump! I faced my fear!
You would think I would be satisfied with my jump, but I wasn’t. Instead I still focused on the fact that I didn’t do the bungee. It took me until later that night when two people said they were proud of me for still jumping and that most people wouldn’t still go back up there to try again. It made me realize that I sometimes focus more on the things I don’t do right rather than the things I do.
You see, a lot of times we try to weigh our deeds with God. We seem to have this need to make sure we do enough good things in order to out weigh the bad or we look at others and make comparisons for assurance that we are at least better than someone. That is not what God is about though. It’s about focusing on your own relationship with Christ rather than others. Just because the other six girls completed the bungee and I didn’t doesn’t mean that I didn’t try. It just means I put myself on the edge and didn’t succeed that one time, but I still got out there and made the attempt to jump.
So even when you feel like you can’t do anymore just get up and try again. You will be glad you did! Trust that God has his hand on you and you will succeed in the end.
Victoria Falls Jump from Rachel Tart on Vimeo.
