I talked in my last blog about forgiveness and the wall I had put up between myself and people in an attempt to protect myself from being hurt. As I was walking through the rice fields here in Cambodia, still worrying about my future and the next step after the Race, God gently whispered to me that I put up a wall between me and Him as well. I still did not trust Him with my whole heart. After reflecting on my life before this crazy year, I realized that the entire time I was living for myself, or attempting to live for Him by making the outside look good, he was in relentless pursuit of my heart. Ever since Honduras , He had convicted me of having an undivided heart; of parceling off a portion of myself that I would let Him control, affect, even love, while still holding back parts to myself. God does not want meaningless ritual, empty sacrifice. He wants me to trust Him enough to give Him my whole heart, all of me, holding nothing back. He will settle for no less and will continue pursuing me until I fully surrender myself to Him.
You won’t relent until you have it all
My heart is yours
