I guess you could say I was “blog stalking” as Rachel calls it. I’ve never met Rachel, nor even talked to her. I just became a follower of her blog. Her blog helped raise me up from sadness and filled me full of faith in God. As crazy as it may sound, her blog helped save me from a darker place! I knew I wanted to meet Rachel once she got back. I wanted to tell her how much her words helped me through one of my darkest times. I knew she home, but I just didn’t know how to approach her to get a hold of her. “Hey I’m Phil and I’ve been stalking your blog for the past few months. Wanna meet up?” yeaaah probably not.
I continued to think about how cool the World Race was, but never really brought myself up to actually “Look” into it. One night while I was laying in bed ready to fall asleep I started having a vision. There were two people walking towards me. Long story short, there was one male and one female. They acted like brother and sister and loved telling and playing jokes….my kind of people. I can’t recall what all happened but I remember them saying “Phil we are your guardian angels. We came here to show you that we are real because someday you will be guardian angel to someone.” That was it. I opened my eyes and they were gone. I tried SO hard to re-enact it, but I couldn’t. Whether they were real or not, it was still an incredible vision. I know what I saw and it scared the crap out of me. I’m pretty new to all this stuff, so I didn’t know what to expect. I prayed about it and God gave me peace and reassured me everything was going to be ok.
I came home late from class one night and got a message in my Facebook inbox.
Message from “JFTB” : February 2 at 10:23pm
Hey Phil! God just told me He wants you to go on the World Race. I’ll write more later, but I’m going back to bed. I think you can go to adventures in missions.org… to get more info.
I don’t think that’s something you can really make up. The next day…
Message from “JFTB”
February 3 at 7:26am
Good Morning!!! ISn’t that crazy?? I was praying in bed and you just popped into my mind, and I was like well what about Phil?? and I just felt like He told me He wanted you to go on The World Race, and I thought really, well, why not me, and he said no, not you. I want Phil. So I was like ok cool. Then I felt like He said get up and go tell Him. And I whined, and argued, no God, He’ll think I’m a wierdo and I am cozy in bed. He just kept buggin me and said I needed to tell you last night that you were asking for direction and He was going to give it to you. SOOooooo He wants you to go.
I was floored when I read this. Why did He tell her and not ME? Probably because I would’ve ignored it and not have actually thought about it. But since He told someone that I absolutely trust, He knew I would listen. Now, I could’ve just been like “whatever JFTB, GO PAINT SOMETHING!” but no, I opened my heart to the idea. I talked to Rachel and Jenny about it and they just said I needed to pray for confirmations. So I did. And I quickly received some! The confirmations kept coming where I least expected them and then I realized that holy smokes rocky, I’m being called upon. I tried to fight it and not go because really, I didn’t. Leave everything for a year? Pass! I learned that if it’s in His will for me, then as a child I must obey. I accepted that God planted this on my heart and began to really think about it. It gave me comfort knowing that I will be meeting new people and sharing God’s love with them. In all reality it’s only 11 months. God has given me 22 years already. I think I can give one. Hopefully when I get back He gives me plenty more years! I can’t change the world, but I can love the people in it as much as I can. What’s the point of having love in your heart if you can’t share it? I love baby Hunter with all my heart and I know he knows it. I show him love every time I see him. I see it by his smile and the sound of his laughter. What if I could love the orphans as much as I love Hunter? What if I could make them laugh and smile? I could make their lives better by letting them know that they are loved; not just by me, but by Jesus as well.
I’d spend hours looking at current World Racer’s blogs and videos. They are doing SO many good things and I want to be part of it. I watched cool videos about Racers teaching English, playing games with kids at orphanages, and spreading God’s love in the slums of the Philippines. I also read about the struggles and the rough living conditions. They all depend on God’s strength to help them get through, and they come out just fine!
I know I’m going to be broken down, shattered, wrecked, but God has a purpose and He will prevail over all! My heart will break for all those who are lost, but my heart will heal as I share the love with them.
