45 days ago I was sitting in a room in a hotel in Atlanta, GA with the 43 humans I was about to travel the world with. We were engaging in listening prayer; given the direction of what we each bring to the table. The gifts, or characteristics that we have so graciously been given that we will boldly step into and steward to our teammates. To I{gnited} Squad. To the nations. My word came easily.
STRENGTH.
It’s a word that had been spoken over me in the weeks before. In every last conversation. In every letter there was the same thing over and over and over again.
“You are strong.”
“You are a rock.”
“You are stronger than you know.”
“I’m praying for strength.”
It’s the words my dad said to me when I was at my end this past March. “You can do this. You’re stronger than you know.”
It’s the reason I wept at the Hillsong concert just a week before when they began the words to Even When It Hurts.
It’s why the Lord had given me a passage in Acts 16 as the vision for my team. And why 6 weeks later it would be the last message I would hear at The Cause church. And the only one I had decided to write in my journal that would accompany me around the world. A message of choosing God over everything. Of not letting my current problem dissolve my praise. Not letting my situation dictate my belief. A message of choosing joy and praise over everything else with such confidence and expectancy that those around me cannot to anything but be awaken. Renewed. Kindled.
And in that moment, in those 5 minutes I spent being still enough to listen to what the Lord was telling me, I understood. And what I wrote was this:
I’m stronger than I know.
I have more strength than I can comprehend.
By underestimating my strength, I’m underestimating God’s strength.
By bowing out, not pressing in or digging deeper, I’m limiting God’s ability to move.
There are things I’m not meant to carry by myself, but that’s how it’s supposed to be.
Strength isn’t just the ability to do something, but the willingness and the motivation to remain standing and let God carry the rest.
And the past 43 days of this Race has been exactly that. It’s changed my definition of the word “strength.” I spent the majority of my life believing that strength was a physical attribute. That it comprised solely how much one could lift or carry or painfully endure. And that couldn’t be further from the truth.
As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. We pray that you’ll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul- not the grim strength of gritting your teeth, but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us.
Colossians 1:10-12 (MSG)
So far in this race, strength has been:
- Leading an entire camp of children with disabilities to American songs and dances, even though I didn’t know 90% of the dance moves.
- Leading my team, my squad and even village churches in worship, even though I had no experience
- Choosing joy and love and rest in 17 hour ministry days, when everything around me was telling me to choose anger and resentment and exhaustion
- Taking delight and allowing myself to worship and be humbled in the misdt of scrubbing 20 toilets or shucking corn for 7 hours
- Being obedient in speaking or sharing a word or message the Lord has given me
- Preaching at a village church on one day’s notice
Strength doesn’t just happen when we continue to do things we excel in. Strength is doing things in spite of our weaknesses. It’s only in embracing our inexperience or flaws or weaknesses and allowing the Lord to replace those with His promises that we find strength.
“When it came to presenting the Message to people who had no background in God’s way, I was the least qualified of any of the available Christians. God saw to it that I was equipped, but you can be sure that it had nothing to do with my natural abilities.” Ephesians 3:8 (MSG)
I’ve found myself overwhelmed on more than one occasion with the realization that God doesn’t need me to do His word, but delights in inviting me in on His plans. And for the first time in my life I fully understand those common Christian phrases, “the joy of the Lord is my strength” (Psalm 28:7) and “all things are possible through Him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13). Because the fact of the matter is we’re never the best. We’re never going to get perfect results. We can’t limit ourselves to things we claim we’re good at. There’s no room for God to move in that. So let’s take a risk and do something we’re uncomfortable doing. Our job is to be obedient. God’s job is results.
“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NLT).
*Stay Tuned for Ministry Specific updates later this week.
** Although my fundraising bar is not yet updated, I only need $359 until I’m FULLY FUNDED. Thankful beyond belief to all friends, family members, churches and frankly strangers who have supported me on this journey. I am forever grateful and cannot put my gratitude into words. thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou
Peace n’ Blessins n’ long live The Tovs.
