“See, I must set before you today life and good, death and evil, in that I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways, and to keep His commandments, His statutes, and His judgments, that you may live and multiply; and the Lord your God will bless you in the land which you go to possess. But if your heart turns away so that you do not hear, and are drawn away, and worship other gods and serve them, I announce to you today that you shall surely perish; you shall not prolong your days in the land which you cross over the Jordan to go in and possess. I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before your life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live; that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice, and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life and the length of your days; and that you may dwell in the land of which the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, to give them.” Deuteronomy 30:15-20
When I have read this in the past I never really thought it pertained to me because of course I am not going to serve other gods. Well, as I was reading this passage last night at a church service it spoke to me in a new way. Yes, I don’t serve other divinities, but don’t I let other things in my life get in the way of my relationship with Jesus?
Last week I participated in a 24/7 prayer retreat where I prayed more than I have before. I learned new forms of prayer and experienced the use of a traditional Hungarian yurt. We decorated this yurt and named it “Kurt”. It is this big white tent with wooden laced walls that fold up to fit into a small car. Anyways, God met me here in this prayer yurt. It doesn’t matter that I was in this place, but I was seeking Him more than I had in a while. I know that is sad. I realized that my closing people out of my heart also met I closed Him out, which was very selfish. I had never realized that by trying not to get hurt by others meant I was only hurting myself. God has been seeking a closer relationship with me for a long time, but I wasn’t allowing Him to have that relationship because of my own fear and doubts. I was like that child from camp. Always thinking in the back of my mind that God didn’t love me like He loves others, why would He seek me out, and I am nothing special or worthwhile.
Satan had fed these lies to me for years and now they had become second nature to me. However, my Papa has been telling me to come to Him and leave those doubts behind. He wants me exactly the way I am. Spending time alone with Him from 2 to 4am was AMAZING!! I was able to pray and worship exactly the way my spirit felt lead to. I think we quickly take for granite the time we have to spend with Him alone. Living in community 24/7 makes it hard for us to find actual alone time to spend in true worship with God. Some of us like to pray out loud, sing, or even dance for our Papa, but we don’t want to do that with others around because it is personal.
“Then Moses called Joshua and said to him in the sight of all Israel, ‘Be strong and of good courage, for you must go with this people to the land which the Lord has sworn to their fathers to give them, and you shall cause them to inherit it. And the Lord, He is the one who goes before you. He will not have you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:7-8
I just keep hearing Him say press on my children for the battle is yours! As we continue the devil has really been attacking us and this spoke volumes to how I have been feeling. Then there was this song called "Let it Rain" that keeps popping up every time we worship even in foreign languages. The Lord has been using this song to speak to all of our hearts. He is going to pour down not only on us but all of the nations!!!! Listen to it.
