In exactly two months I will be walking on American soil for the first time in almost one year! By that time, I will have been to three different continents, thirteen different countries, and eleven different ministries, slept in more than twenty beds, excluding buses and planes, and eaten more rice than I’d care to admit.
I’ve experienced things beyond my wildest dreams, grown, learned, cried, laughed, and gained friendships which will last long past the World Race. However, because the end is quickly approaching, everyone is asking the million dollar question “So what are your plans after the race?” Most days I want to stand on the tallest building and scream “I HAVE NO IDEA!” but the truth of the matter is, every day I ask myself the same question. What will life look like? Where will I live? Where will I work? Do I go back to school? Do I even like what I went to school for? What am I passionate about? There are so many things I would love doing, but is that what God has for me?
It’s an endless cycle.
For the last nine months I’ve toyed with the idea of just finding a job in event coordinating, because, well, I’m good at it. I’ve thought about going to pastry school because who doesn’t love cupcakes, or what about moving overseas and working in a coffee shop; new people are great, I’d love to meet more.
But with all of these great ideas I just never felt fully confident or at peace with any of them. I’ve prayed, I’ve researched, I’ve contemplated, I’ve changed my mind, and then changed it again.
This month has been extremely difficult. Our days are full of ministry, but we also have unlimited access to Wi-Fi and we all know how that goes. Once you click on one link, it leads you to another, and then to another, and then by 1am you have a list of things which sound great but you don’t know what to do and you have to be up in 5 hours.
It’s exhausting. My brain is tired and I just want answers.
But, ya know, it’s really funny how God works.
In Kosovo He showed me what he had planned, but I at that point I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do what he wanted. It would require more school, more effort, and more time than I care to wait. So I pushed those thoughts to the back burner continuing to look for something better suited to my standards.
Well, here we are, right where we ended 5 months ago, God telling me the exact same thing.
He wasn’t pushy or demanding. He didn’t require my answer right then and there. He was gentle, revealing the passions and desires He placed on my heart bit by bit, child by child.
This past week, as I was sitting in a small room filled with thirty children all under the age of ten I said “Yes!” I said yes to surrounding myself with little giggles, little toes, and messy faces. I said yes to teaching them the fundamentals, praising them on their good days, and loving them even harder on the bad.
So what does all of this mean? What is my answer to the question of all questions?
Well, when I return to the States I will be taking the Miller Analogies Test and applying to grad schools for a master’s degree in Curriculum and Instruction in Elementary Ed! I don’t know where I will be attending or what semester I will be starting, all I know is God has been using these nine months to mold, shape, and prepare me for this specific path and I cannot wait to get started!
**I am still raising funds for transportation home from Miami, Florida. As of now, plane tickets will costs approximately $300. You all have helped me so much already with all your financial and prayerful support, but if you have even $10 to donate it would help!
You can donate at paypal.com using my email address [email protected]; donating to my WorldRace account will only donate to the organization, those funds will not make it to me.
