I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m writing on my World Race blog now that I’m back in America. I’ve been home for almost 5 months now, which still feels weird. The Race often feels lifetimes ago. I’ve adjusted back to normal life for the most part; I still have days where I miss bits and pieces of life on The Race. I definitely miss my team a lot, which is ironic for those who followed my journey with my team this year.
Anywho, I promised to keep you updated on what lie ahead for me and after much prayer the Lord has something better than I could have ever imagined in store for me.
For those of you who don’t remember, during my second month on The Race a conference called The Awakening was held where all the squads out on the field met in Romania, along with staff members and Race alumni for a week of worship. They held various sessions and I chose to attend one given by AIM Director Seth Barnes, called Kingdom Dreams.
I remember him asking these questions…
What keeps you up at night? What are you passionate about? What makes you excited? What makes you tick?
Honestly, at the time I wasn’t sure I really had an answer for that. I take that back. My answer was (and still is) makeup (I grew up wanting to be a beauty editor at a magazine). But when I moved to New York to do so something was missing in chasing that dream.
Would I have ever admitted to that anyone else? Heck no. Especially to a group of other missionaries who talk about being kept awake at night by thoughts of orphans, and homeless people sleeping on the streets, or the million other injustices in this world. Meanwhile, my head was swimming with images of “achieving the perfect liquid line” (if you can name that quote, I’d be impressed).
Anywho, I left the conference excited but unsure why. For the next several months the Lord grew a passion for human trafficking in me. I had never heard about this injustice before and yet I grew excited when I thought about being able to help.
During my month in Israel I got sick for a few days and had to stay behind from ministry one afternoon. I remember falling asleep and experiencing for the first time a vision from the Lord. I felt a little crazy but I’d been praying for God to reveal himself to me in new ways and to offer me some glimpse of what lie ahead for me. He gave me a vision for starting a nonprofit makeup line to benefit human trafficking.
Towards the end of my Race I finally made it to Thailand. The hottest, most humid place on earth (I hate the heat) and I fell in love. Head over heels in love. I spent that month with a group of women from K Squad doing bar ministry every night. My heart broke for these women. When it came time to leave I spent some time grieving. This was the first time on The Race I’d really grown attached to a place and I knew it held something for me.
I returned home from The Race and began searching for a ‘big girl’ job and have been turned down more times than I care to admit. I began to wonder what was wrong with me. One day I was praying and I began to ask if God was trying to tell me something. After all, I had asked him to close doors for me. I decided to devote a week of praying into starting on the makeup line he’d given me a vision for. After countless signs I knew this is what He has for me in this next season of life.
So, in January I will be moving to Ohio to begin working on my makeup line. Why Ohio? Well, for those of you who remember my squad leaders, The Alonzo’s, they have started a community house and I will be moving up there and living with several people from my Race and getting encouragement and help during this season.
My other favorite question, how do you start a makeup line? Wonderful question. I’m learning more than I ever wanted to know about starting a nonprofit, a makeup line etc. But I remember reading something a while back that said something along the lines of that’s when you know you have a kingdom dream; when it is bigger than yourself, not something you could ever do on your own. And I can’t, but the Lord can. I believe He is bigger than the money I’ll need to start this venture, bigger than the people who say it can’t be done and think I’m crazy, bigger than all the business know-how’s and terms that confuse me to death. I know this is what the Lord has in store for me.
I am excited and terrified all in the same breath. I have never dealt well with the unknown, though The Race did teach me to take it in stride and I have seen firsthand how the Lord works in that. So please be praying for me during this season. In the next coming months I’ll be sure to start a new blog and keeping those of you who are interested updated with this new adventure! Thank you for the many of you who supported me financially and through prayers while I was on The Race and those of you who continue to do so now. I have loved seeing the many ways the Lord uses people for different purposes in the Kingdom.
