Training camp ended almost 2 weeks ago and in that space of time I’ve been able to really process all that training camp (TC) was. TC is a time of self evaluation, examining our relationship with the Lord and the baggage we carry that continually gets in the way, and how we can clear that path. TC conjures joy and fear simultaneously while demanding vulnerability with God and the squad/future family of 47 people you just met. But, more than anything TC is an opportunity to create time and space to ask ourselves how far are we willing to go with the Lord? How all in are we in this call on our lives? Are we ready to give ourselves completely to God in this journey? Because very rapidly you realize during TC that it will require no less.
There is an excerpt from a chapter in the book The Weight of Glory written by C.S. Lewis (I’m a huge lover of C.S. lewis works so be prepared many future blogs will probably include quotes from him!) titled ‘A slip of the tongue,’ that jumped into my mind very early on into TC and which I haven’t been able to shake since:
“This is my endlessly recurrent temptation: to go down to that Sea (I think St. John of the cross called God a sea) and there neither dive nor swim nor float, but only dabble and splash, careful not to get out of my depth and holding on to the lifeline which connects me with my things temporal.”
How easy it is to fall victim to this temptation. To choose what we know and what makes us comfortable instead of opening up to the possibility that the Lord may call us to a season in our lives that is quite unexpected and uncomfortable, but always good. I have so often made sure not to go too far, usually without even realizing it. Drawing up just short of those bold prayers I should be praying or asking the questions I know I should be asking God. Because what if God demands more? What if God calls me even deeper, into depths unknown?
But, the only way to come to fully realize who we are is to let go completely. To allow God to have all of who we are. To die daily to ourselves, and thus say yes to the Lord’s call to pull us deeper in relationship with Him, however that may look.
So as I continued through my time at TC, the Lord’s whisper of, “let go, completely,” came at me again and again. I either could choose to go on the World Race only allowing God and my team to have parts of me, or I could choose to dive headlong into His sweet loving call on my life to come face to face with the eternal here on earth.
I am so incredibly all in for all God is going to show me as I navigate this journey of the World Race that my heart feels like it’s gonna burst from the beautiful steadfast love Jesus has shown me. So, here we go!!!
Be well friends
