This blog
entry is dedicated to my sister, Rachel, and my parents, who don’t always tell
me what I WANT to hear, but, thank God, what I NEED to hear.
I’ve been struggling over the last few weeks with thoughts about
not getting the support I need or thinking maybe I was not listening to God
about this trip. I guess I started thinking this way when I looked at my funds
and saw that no one had donated any money to my trip yet. Bummer. Then I
started thinking all of these crazy thoughts like, well, maybe God doesn’t want
me to go on this trip because maybe I’m trying to run away from recent events
that have happened in my life.. or maybe deep inside I am being selfish in my
desire to go on this trip… at one point I even started doubting my trip.
Then, as usual, my amazing sister, Rachel, sensing my
restlessness came to me and said,
“Tye, are you Praying about this trip??”
“Yea..” I replied but didn’t really feel like talking about what
I really meant which was Yes I’ve been
praying that God will start making money appear in my account and SHOW me that I’m supposed to go on this trip..
“Well,” Rachel said, “You need to REALLY pray about this trip,
even to the point where you’re asking God if this is what HE wants for you.”
Boy, I did not like hearing that. I got accepted, right?? But in
my heart, I knew she was right. I couldn’t just sit around asking God for help
without really knowing if this was HIS will. So I prayed. This time it was a
different prayer. I didn’t pray for money, I didn’t pray that people would look
at my blog or send me awesome messages on facebook about the trip, or that I
would meet awesome Christian friends through this trip. I stared from square
one. “God, do you want me to go on this trip. SHOW me that
this is what you want from me. Show me that I am not doing this for myself, but
to spread your WORD. Give me peace about this huge decision, and that you are
going to use me in whatever way you can to build your Kingdom. I trust YOU. You
know my heart and my motivations. I’m ready to LISTEN to you.”
Over and over again. I didn’t tell anyone I was having doubts or
struggling with peace about this trip because I knew God would give me an
answer. What better way to look for answers and wisdom than in our Father’s
WORD.
Philippians
4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and
petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of
God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds
in Jesus Christ.
Guess, what? It’s actually true, that Bible.
THE VERY NEXT day I
talked to my mom. All casual she said:
“You know we’ve really been praying for you and we are going to
sign up to donate $100 a month to your trip, starting today.”
Same day: My pastor e-mails me and says he wants to get together
and talk about the trip and raising support.
Next day: My friends start talking about support raising ideas
that they have for me such as yard sales, parties, sharing my story with their
churches, friends etc.
Get the picture?? GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS. Oh, I’m going on this
trip all right, and I know God’s got something in store for me. My doubts are
gone, and I am going to completely trust GOD. He is all-powerful. Oh yea, and PLEASE continue to pray for me and
all of the other amazing people going on this trip.
