I was feeling pretty darn low the other day. Frustration about the state of my personal
funding had reached a boiling point. I
was freaking out because unless I get new monthly supporters I won’t make
enough to live. My reserves will be gone
in the next two months.
funding had reached a boiling point. I
was freaking out because unless I get new monthly supporters I won’t make
enough to live. My reserves will be gone
in the next two months.
I don’t have a backup plan. This is what God has called me to do.
Living by faith does not come easy to me. I LOVE the work I get to do and the life it
allows me to lead. I just finished an
end of the year newsletter on my “2012 Top 10” (if you missed it here is a
link.) I was overwhelmed by the rich
opportunities God has given me this year.
They include, praying with our guests at Fill-A-Belly (F.A.B), walking 122
miles across Swaziland despite crazy blisters, and hilarious moments with
junior high students.
allows me to lead. I just finished an
end of the year newsletter on my “2012 Top 10” (if you missed it here is a
link.) I was overwhelmed by the rich
opportunities God has given me this year.
They include, praying with our guests at Fill-A-Belly (F.A.B), walking 122
miles across Swaziland despite crazy blisters, and hilarious moments with
junior high students.
(I’m in the middle of this photo which was taken right after walking across Swazi.)
Tomorrow I get to head down to help out at an Orphanage in Mexico for the weekend. Pray that we have a safe and fruitful trip.
I had planned on visiting Jose Luis and Cindy Pesina this
fall, but snapping my calf muscle put that trip on hold. In order to set up future trips I need to get
the lay of the land. After months of
this adventure being on pause, everything came together this week. I even have friends to travel with, which is
a huge gift.
fall, but snapping my calf muscle put that trip on hold. In order to set up future trips I need to get
the lay of the land. After months of
this adventure being on pause, everything came together this week. I even have friends to travel with, which is
a huge gift.
Despite loving what I do, I don’t like depending on God to
provide through other people. Somewhere
along the way I learned that I needed to do everything for my self. While journaling I came to this conclusion – I
HATE asking. I loathe the vulnerability
of having a need and making that need public.
I know God is teaching me something of lasting value in this season, but
that does not make it easier!
provide through other people. Somewhere
along the way I learned that I needed to do everything for my self. While journaling I came to this conclusion – I
HATE asking. I loathe the vulnerability
of having a need and making that need public.
I know God is teaching me something of lasting value in this season, but
that does not make it easier!
Making other’s needs known is no issue; in fact it’s
fun. Just last week I had a blast asking
for one of our F.A.B. guests. I wrote
about Dan (name changed) in my blog Gone.
fun. Just last week I had a blast asking
for one of our F.A.B. guests. I wrote
about Dan (name changed) in my blog Gone.
“Tonight
a friend who has been with us since the early days in the park shared his pain.
After years as an alcoholic he has gotten sober and managed to stay there for
over a year. He now has a home and is working day to day, trying to maintain a
normal life, but the balance is precarious. His back is injured. His only
income is day labor. He might not make rent this month and that would catapult
him back onto the streets. Despite all that his primary concern is his
daughters Christmas. She is still innocent, he can’t bear the thought of
that being shattered.”
a friend who has been with us since the early days in the park shared his pain.
After years as an alcoholic he has gotten sober and managed to stay there for
over a year. He now has a home and is working day to day, trying to maintain a
normal life, but the balance is precarious. His back is injured. His only
income is day labor. He might not make rent this month and that would catapult
him back onto the streets. Despite all that his primary concern is his
daughters Christmas. She is still innocent, he can’t bear the thought of
that being shattered.”
In the last few weeks, people have rallied around Dan in a
beautiful way. A group is arranging
Christmas presents for his daughter. Not
second hand presents, but new exciting gifts for her. I ran into a friend whose husband is a
Chiropractor and he agreed to see Dan for free.
After driving Dan to his appointments, he told me that he had not been
able to move his neck that way for the last 14 years. He was giddy with excitement over how good
his back felt.
beautiful way. A group is arranging
Christmas presents for his daughter. Not
second hand presents, but new exciting gifts for her. I ran into a friend whose husband is a
Chiropractor and he agreed to see Dan for free.
After driving Dan to his appointments, he told me that he had not been
able to move his neck that way for the last 14 years. He was giddy with excitement over how good
his back felt.
This Season, I’ve had a front row seat to the giving parade
and it has been a blast. On Monday night
our living room was stuffed full with sleeping bags and presents for F.A.B. guests.
and it has been a blast. On Monday night
our living room was stuffed full with sleeping bags and presents for F.A.B. guests.
On Tuesday one of my favorite guys was sobbing over loosing his backpack that day. We were able to hand him a new backpack filled with supplies and a new sleeping bag so he could stay warm at night. This weekend I get to help hand out gifts for orphans in Mexico. It’s wonderful to watch God provide for people!
(Presents for the homeless under the tree at North Coast Vista’s, Carlsbad Campus.)
Even in the midst of all this beauty – I miss it. The day I was feeling crappy about my funding
I started reading through Exodus. As I
waded through the story of God providing Manna for the Israelites while they
wondered in the wilderness, I got frustrated.
Why did the people complain and not believe when God was miraculously
giving them enough food every day?
I started reading through Exodus. As I
waded through the story of God providing Manna for the Israelites while they
wondered in the wilderness, I got frustrated.
Why did the people complain and not believe when God was miraculously
giving them enough food every day?
Then it hit me… I
am just like the Israelites.
am just like the Israelites.
God has provided enough for me every day since stepping out
into missions and going on full support.
Here’s the truth I was missing:
my refrigerator is full, I can put enough gas in my car to drive Dan to
his chiropractic appointments, and I haven’t missed a mortgage payment. I might not know if I will have enough in two
months but God has miraculously given me enough for today.
into missions and going on full support.
Here’s the truth I was missing:
my refrigerator is full, I can put enough gas in my car to drive Dan to
his chiropractic appointments, and I haven’t missed a mortgage payment. I might not know if I will have enough in two
months but God has miraculously given me enough for today.
Later that afternoon a friend, who had no idea what I had
been going through, e-mailed me this blessing, “Praying you can see and enjoy the manna God has set out for you
today.” Wow! I might be slow, but thankfully, God is
persistent.
been going through, e-mailed me this blessing, “Praying you can see and enjoy the manna God has set out for you
today.” Wow! I might be slow, but thankfully, God is
persistent.
If you want to financially
support the ministry I do, click on the “Support Me” link on the left side of
this page and choose “Staff Support” in the drop down menu. All gift are tax-deductible.
support the ministry I do, click on the “Support Me” link on the left side of
this page and choose “Staff Support” in the drop down menu. All gift are tax-deductible.
